Til death ...or infidelity do we part. ..
I've loved my husband for Ober 15 years. We got together during a time i was at my lowest. In the middle of my son's addiction, a split in our family that left me feeling outside looking in on my own life. I meet Ken, fell in love and loved the attention he made me feel loved, special, desired. Then 10 yrs in infidelity. He begged forgiveness, a mistake. Abbs I did something I've never sobe. I forgave him. Then here we are 6 years lateragain. My heart isn't readily moved. Once, okay perhaps a mistake, again is a choice. December is our 10th annivesary you. He wants to renew vows but I for see that happening. I need a lot more to think there is something. He spooky talk, he won't change fso iribbing I'm going to need to made the change. I want love...loyalty...monogamy ...I wad to be his everything ....but it's too crowded ţ be just the 2 of us. Sad but it sends to be the result.
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That's sad. I know you are hurting. You didn't go into any details and you may not be ready to or may not ever want to share the details. I would think that a short term thing would be a bit less hurtful than a long term one. It's something you are going to have to make a decision on. He came to you at a very vulnerable time. I don't know how men think, they are so different than us and apparently don't comprehend the pain they can cause when they are in that moment. If it helps, the ball is in your court. He is the guilty one begging for another chance. You are the one now with the power. If you don't think you can forgive him, then you can walk away, or if you want to save the marriage you can tell him he has to prove himself to you. How to do that is something he will just have to figure out. I'm so, so sorry you are going through this.
I'm so sorry that you are going through this and just want you to know that I'm sending you lots of loving care at this time. I trust that you will know what to do and please know that you are not alone. There are other sisters of the heart who have experienced this kind of betrayal and my own mother did. My dad later told me that it was his greatest regret and oh, how he had wished that he had worked with what he had with my mom.
Please nurture yourself as much as you can and give yourself the tender loving care that he is unable to give you right now.
Gentle care and please do let us know how you are doing and feeling as I'm sure it must feel as if it changes by the minute at times.
Heartfelt (((hugs)))
XO Joanie
I hope that you find the answer that is what you want... What anyone else thinks you should do including me... means nothing... Whatever direction you go will have lots of hurt... I believe you will heal from the hurt... to stay and forgive but be fearful... or to go and build your life again... it will be rough and it will take time. I hope in the meantime it will help knowing I hear, I care, and I will not judge. Hugs Elissa