I hate them too. I don't know if it's any consolation at all, but I really do.
Lots of love.

I'm so tired of feeling like I did or said something wrong.

I'm tired of that too. Let them all just go to hell.

I know what u mean- I have no faith in them. Just last night I had a discussion with three of his friends. Men all think alike. They tell me it's so hard resisting temptation with all the women out there that throw themselves at them. It's like they sided with ex cause he had cheated but mostly lied in our marriage etc.
All they could say was its hard being a man and cheating happens and they called cheating "a mistake". I said cheating is not a mistake. Cheating is a choice u made. I ended up getting so mad because trying to explain how all we want is a man who is loyal and doesn't lie and will love us the way we love them.
Apparently that's asking too much. They said I love my ex too hard. Said I need to give him more freedom and leave all the hurt in the past and just trust him. It's not that easy.
I hate men. I could care less if I ever date or have sex again. They are all the same.

I hate these pathetic excuses people make for them.
I like having male friends, to dance, to hang out. But if anyone of them touches me he'll end up in the trash bin. I don't need this. I tore myself apart for two years only to be thrown into the trash bin myself. Now they're all going to get that back. I just want to be left alone.

MissMom and ladies.... I have felt the way you ladies have felt. But I have also seen people move on and have long healthy marriages. It really all depends on who you couple with. In other words, yes, MEN DO SUCK. BUT MAYBE IT IS BECAUSE IT IS THE SAME KIND OF MEN WE ARE ATTRACTED TO.

Why don't we fall for the homely/nerdy family guy? LOL OK they may be a little emasculated but what good are these macho men doing for us if we can't even stay in relationship with them?!

Maybe a long, healthy marriage is not meant for me. And maybe I'm better off this way. I don't know how to be attracted to a normal man who's not a tall, muscled sex god. I can perfectly stay friends with the nerdy/family guy but going intimate with him? No, thanks, I won't force myself.

This guy isn't even all that. Not even close. He's to say the least: mediocre. He's got a pot belly, obviously not in teh best shape. I'm way out of his league.
Which makes this all the more confusing..

Maybe he's got other traits that attract you? Not necessarily physical?
I'm way out of his league too, but the other way around. He's a sex god and I'm far from being a supermodel. I'm short, for the start. But well, I'm not attracted to anyone else so I'm not going to force myself to be with another man just for the appearances. We can't have all we want in life so why pretend it can work out with someone else? No, it can't. I know myself well enough.

It's not confusing missmom...it's very normal for us to be attracted to men who are unavailable in one way or another. I've had a lot of my girlfriends say they feel like they have a blinking light on their foreheads flashing "Losers Welcome!!"....and we do!!! Until we learn to love and value ourselves we can't turn off that vacancy sign. When the first thing we think when a guy doesn't call goes from "what's wrong with me?" to "what's that guys problem" - because you, of course, are kind, witty, fun to be around and DEFINITELY WORTH CALLING - then you know you're at a good place. And I know it sucks to have anyone not call...but I for one am really very HAPPY this guy didn't call you - instead of in a few months you completely devastated that he stood you up, can't communicate, can't keep commitments...Pat yourself on the back for dodging that bullet, celebrate the fact that you acknowledged his shortcomings sooner rather than later, and treat yourself to something for that accomplishment (even if it's something small, like a new song for .99 cents). I'm proud of you (for what that's worth), and when you are proud of you, I promise, it's amazing - guys like this one won't even be on your radar (you won't even notice their absence) - you'll KNOW your worth love and respect, and when you expect it, that's exactly what you'll get....

Thank you Dink711. I KNOW I'm worth calling. This guy's got a definate problem, because I AM ALL THAT.

Thank you for the praises..and YES, I realize I dodged a bullet. I will not go down that road again.

Miss--okay, so you met a manipulative, 'not right' guy. You are not ready, you need more time to heal, get cenred in yourself and be in a healthy place to just it all happen or slide. It's okay for the man OR us to meet someone, like them, feel attraction and then not go further. Should he have messaged you back to say, "Um, you are a lovely and beautiful woman but I am not interested." People do what they do and it doesn't make everyone an asshole.
Let it GO. Let it go. Let it go.
Honestly, it's not the end of the world, you were not in a committed relationship, you did not get deeply hurt....I think he mixed you up a little and maybe you feel a little vulnerable and embarrassed.
I would add that I find this type of communication, "Why are YOU so quiet?" and "What's up? You disappeared...." when it takes two to be in contact and make it happen just bullshit and manipulative SO he is not the right person and amen to him not getting any closer. All good.
This is not worth the energy you are devoting to it and what it demonstrates to me is that THIS has nothing to do with him. Who is he? Your man, your friend? Nope, just a little hopeful acquaintance. Walk on, head high and just take care of YOU.
All said with love and respect!

I hate them too LOL. Missmom, this is your chance to avert another episode.. you are on a learning curve, you have not really put yourself out there with him and now you know.. he is a waste of time. Next time you may know even sooner and so on and so on.

Hang in there girly

Absolutely. he owes me nothing. and no this is not the end of the world. What BOGGLES is how he spoke of 'us' of his plans with me, WHY even bother saying shit like that !??? He had to have known on some level that he would not follow through. This was LAST SUNDAY! After I last msgd him last night, he could have answered and said 'you know, you're great but it's bad timing or I'm just not into you..'or whatever. He did not. he just ignored me. that makes him asshole-ish.

And yes, I agree about the manipulative 'where have you beens, and why haven't you calleds' I recognized that immediately and I'd cal lhim on those every time.


Anyhow, it is what it is. I'm fine. Just pissed. oh well.

Thank you Bubbles. yes, you're right. I hadn't put myself out there as much as I could have and I'm so glad for that.