I hope everything works out. Just having him admit and try to quit is a huge step. One that my AH will never make. Hang on tight.

Many prayers for both of you wishing the very best.

Have you considered going through detox? It would be easier for him to withdraw with medical supervision.

Sending lots of support and good wishes!

Prayers for a happy ending - I'm actually typing this sitting next to my husband and it is a miracle! Hugs.

I know of a few who sincerely asked God and he totally removed their craving for it. I pray this for your husband. It CAN happen! My heart is full of hope for you!

Thank you EVERYONE. Today was hard for him. Of course he did have some alcohol, but nothing compared to how it used to be. I actually wondered if maybe he is tapering himself off TOO quickly, but I did not say that to him, as I don't want to discourage him.

He is very irratable and yelled at me, making me run to the bathroom in tears. When I calmed down and walked back out, be was doing the dishes, obviously feeling guilty. I know he feels horrible in every aspect. I gave him a little back scratch and a few minutes later he relaxed, and we went to watch some TV and within minutes he was asleep. Again.

He has been sleeping so so much. I am concerned about how he will go to work tomorrow? He had a friend bring him a Xanax, but I know one will not really do anything. I asked him if he is ready to go talk to our Dr, and get medical help, and he said yes. So that will be the next step.

4:54 am
Stressing out! Don't know what else to do to calm myself, do I am here. I cannot wake him up! He needs to be at work in 34 minutes but is so out of it. I did all I could, poke, shake, yell - he just Moana for me to stop. I kept asking who I should contact to tell them he's not going to work, but it's like my words made no sense to him! Oh, how I hate this! Despite the fact that I am proud of him, WHY did it have to get this ugly?

Are you sure he hasn't taken something? He needs medical help immediately. Call an ambulance if you have to!

how's he doing? how are you?

He finally woke up, very groggy, and called work that he is not coming in. It's like he has a mild flu. But he seems overall more relaxed and less irritable. I'm ok. Took Baby N to the mall for a few hours to play with a friend at the Lego store, just so AH can recover in silence. I'm still not holding my breath for a miracle recovery. I feel he will be too tempted by the fact that alcohol is literally EVERYWHERE and almost EVERYONE drinks it. I'm just braving myself for that. And if it doesn't happen, if he overcomes this... well then, I will just praise God for the rest of my life for this miracle!

Good thing I wasn't holding my breath.
He had a friend pick him up today. Idk... maybe 9 hours ago (I was out with baby N, to give him "quiet time" as he called it). I called twice to check on him, he told me he wasn't drinking, was smoking pot to help with the withdrawals, and that he'd be home soon. After a few hours obviously I assumed the worst and texted him that once again he has shown me by his actions that he will ALWAYS place himself first and that I and our son are secondary. I also told him not to come home. An hour later he (just now) he texted me an uncomprehendable message, claiming he loves me. Lol. That means NOTHING TO ME as I am no longer emotionally attached or invested in him. I'm just glad that I didn't truly believe he would stop drinking, or I'd probably be crying my soul out right now, and instead I have peace in my heart and am calmly getting ready for bed.

If he feels like he has to function so he can get back to work before he gets through this, his mind will reason with him that he HAS to drink enough to be able to fulfill his provider responsibility. It's a vicious cycle. He needs enough days to get through the dts but not so many that it starts to be a crutch. Do you know any alcoholics who are IN recovery?. He needs support from others in his shoes. There's a group here at daily strength for him

My heart goes out to you. The roller coaster of withdrawals and relapse is no fun. If he does decide to try again, follow Ginny's advice and get medical help. They'll provide meds to help him come off more comfortably and can monitor him through the process.

Laurie provides great advice as well. The alcoholic mind will tell him whatever he needs to hear to convince him to drink again. It's not easy to do it alone and once sober, it's extremely hard to stay sober without support (and we can't be their sole support). Alcohol is his coping mechanism. If life gets hard, it's always there for him - even though he hates it. It makes him numb to his feelings, to his problems, to life.

I am glad to hear that you were able to calmly go to bed. You didn't give away your power to him. Kudos and strength to you.

I left today. After him simply being GONE for over 24 hours, I packed up my clothes, packed stuff for baby N, called my best girlfriend who I've known for 17 years and she is aware of the situation, and drove 2 hours to her house to spend the night. Tomorrow I will visit my parents and spend the night tbere, and Thursday night I will go home. I just need a BREAK from him! When I texted him that I will not be home upon his arrival, first he called me all pleasant like I was just being silly, then he tried to manipulate, threaten, beg, scare, ANYTHING to get me to go home tonight. I stood my ground and said NO I need a couple days away from this bs life we call marriage. I sent him a very details message of what I expect when I come home on two days, and that he better take it seriously. I am not being dramatic or whatever. He NEEDS to see that he WILL lose me and his only child if he does not get his act together and FAST.

This is the text I sent him. It's not necessary an ultimatum... more like me just giving up, I think?


So... I'm going to my parents until Thursday night. You have 3 options.
1. If anything is in any way damaged in the house, I will assume you no longer want to continue with this relationship, and I will remove myself and my belongings immediately.
2. If the house remains the same, I will assume that you want to continue living the same way we are now, where you get us by, and use the rest of the money on yourself, and I will continue being a homemaker
3. If you put in the effort and clean the whole house, top to bottom, before Thursday night, I will assume that you want to change your ways and be the husband that you are supposed to be.

Also... if you do not go to work tomorrow, I will assume you are no longer going to provide for the family you have created, and same as with 1. I will remove myself and my belongings immediately and you can live any way you want, with whomever you want, and get as drunk and high as you desire until the day you die, and I will NEVER bother you again.

Wow - congratulations! You have stood strong and made your expectations clear. Next step is following through on what you have said, regardless. That's the tough part.

Sending you strength!