Widows & Widowers Support Group

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wouldve been our 4 year anniversary tomo. july 6th

cgriff4ever
cgriff4ever

Well everyone, it's been 2 years and 6 months since the love of my life passed from this earth to be in heaven.  Not trying to offend anyone.  Tomorrow wouldve been our 4 year wedding anniversary.  I am sad, but I will celebrate, rather than being depressed and sad.  I'm going with my bestfriend of almost 20 years, for a motorcycle ride to colorado.  I'm looking forward to the serenity of the mountains, and quietness within my own minds eye.  I can see my husband now, he would be telling me to go out and have some fun, enjoy, and always smile.  


I've been doing ok,  I have found that I have been a bit mildly depressed, but I did just have a small/minor surgery, and am having difficulties with side effects from that.  I have met some new friend, pushing forward best way I can.  I just don't seem to have the same get up and go, or should I said, OCD, of getting everything that's on my list done, yesterday.  I don't seem to have the same stamina, like I did when my husband was here physically, (before he passed away).  Anyone else noticed, they are'nt as motivated, or just don't have that umph... to get er done.  Well,  I wish everyone who has lost their soulmates, a bit of peace, and a smile as time passes.  Much love and hugs carla

parrotluvr
parrotluvr
Yes, definitely. I'm no doubt a lot older than you as my husband and I had been married 32 years and my children are grown. My husband passed just a month ago but I definitely am not as motivated. I was running the dust mop around the floor today and was thinking, "Why am I even bothering to do this?" What difference does it make? Also I have always been an avid reader. Today I checked out two books from the library, two books I have really been wanting to read. Then I thought, "Why bother?" One of these days you'll be dead and what good will that reading have done you? So, yes, I can't even figure out why I should do anything but, yet, I don't think I'm really depressed. It just seems like life has no meaning.
roxanne809
roxanne809
Carla, I find it difficult to be motivated since I am here alone in this house; and there is no accountability to anyone to clean, keep things straight, change the decor, etc. If I leave dishes in the sink, no one else sees them so they can sit for days. I brought all my Christmas stuff upstairs after the holidays to go through it since I have so much I never use any more. Guess what? Embarrassing to say, all those boxes and containers are still in the dining room. It just seems too overwhelming of a task to sift through all those memories. So, yes, I can relate with lack of motivation. Also, I am older; and my stamina isn't as it once was. By the time I complete a work day, I am ready to hit my well-worn couch. Have a relaxing trip to Colorado and enjoy the beauty. Never visited, but, from pictures, it appears to be a beautiful state. Roxanne
deremusl
deremusl
Carla, I hope your ride to Colorado brings you all the joy and peace you deserve on this special yet bittersweet day.

It's been 2 years and almost 5 months since my husband passed away, and I too have felt some depression for the last few months, even more than in the early days of my grief. I was always a get 'er done yesterday (also OCD:) kind of person, but it seems it takes me much longer to do anything, and I often have to find the motivation to do it at all. I get overwhelmed so easily because I'm tired all the time. I'm blaming it on the summer heat. Too hot to get out as much, and trying to do inside things when the sky is so blue and the sun is shining is a drag.
Please don't take this in the wrong way, but it makes me feel better knowing I'm not the only one feeling a little blah. Thank you for sharing your feelings.

Hopefully your trip will help. Have a wonderful time!

Hugs to you,
Linda
scottito
scottito
Hi Carla Barla. Yup, my go done gone away. I'm getting so good at just kickin' back and being lazy. Enjoy your ride, you biker "chick" you. Love, Scott
cgriff4ever
cgriff4ever
Thank you everyone, I find that the days, just don't have the same meaning anymore, and then I know sean wants me to have meaning for each and every moment. So I'm realizing all the times, that sean would say, "Don't worry, it'll all work out". Now it seems not only do I not worry as much, but I don't seem to have the energy to get the important things done, sometimes. I just so much more concentrate on things that matter. Although this may sound bad, I'm glad I'm not alone. sigh... just wish, I could get that ray of sunshine back, somedays.. lol. Well, this lady is on her way to see the sights, and maybe take some deep breaths, and remember this special day of my and seans wedding anniversary. I so miss my buddy!! my one and only soulmate.. I hope he is rooting for me from heaven, and still remembers that I was a special person in his life.. Love to all, and thank you for sharing, especially, my tarzan. lol
geo70
geo70
No where near as motivated but I now have so much more to do, raising 3 isn't easy since they are in their teenage years.
raininseattle
raininseattle
Have a great ride Carla. It's good to get out a bit and watch the nature.
staygolden3
staygolden3
Enjoy yourself Carla! You know that Sean would want that for you!! He is still seeing the world through your eyes so go for it girl!!
Luv ya sissy ladybug!
Big hugs!
Darcie
SandyZal
SandyZal
Yes I have the same thing. I'm tired all the time and I have no motivation. All I want is to be with my husband in heaven. I'm not suicidal but I can't wait for that day to happen.
cgriff4ever
cgriff4ever
Thank you to everyone for your love and encouragement, especially my sissy queenie. My love to you all and hope a smile..and as my husband would say when he would get something done "ad a boy/girl".. lol
karenj
karenj
I hope you enjoy yourself, and always know he is watching over his favorite lady.
jdp
jdp
Yes, it's an effort to get motivated, it's been 4 years for me.
You have something to look forward to, enjoy!
Best wishes on your trip,
jdp
cgriff4ever
cgriff4ever
Ok everyone...i bit the bullet..at the restaurant that introduced me to my soulmate..our first date Feb 2013. Crying while trying to eat a salad. But I did it!! Almost 3 years and I've been too sad and afraid. Today I conquered my fear and feel Sean's presence and can feel his hand on my leg...telling me...it will be ok...he was my knight.. .the memories are flooding my memory..he was late 15 minutes...but as soon as he walked in....i just knew he was my angel.. love you all. This place and all of you wonderful people have helped me beyond belief...scottie, Cheryl, darcie, linda, Rachel, Sandy, Johnny, Tim and I'm sure I've forgotten names..god bless everyone. Love carla
msgood
msgood
Life is a journey...........enjoy your ride
Hugs, Jeanne
cgriff4ever
cgriff4ever
Update, had a great time. Got to walk up to a 100 ft waterfall, and got pretty close, took a chance and walked the trail, (it was a easy trail created by about 120 students 2 years ago) It was in colorado, and it was so serene and beautiful. My sean would've been happy for me, that I had a good time, and was able to enjoy some very beautiful scenery, and be relaxed. Much love and hugs carka
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