Widows & Widowers Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.

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Such great pain

Kathyellen
Kathyellen

I am in such pain.  My husband took his life 2 months ago without my not even understanding why.  We were on our way to work - we worked at the same place and had an argument about my wanting to join a gym.   He turned around and we came home and he told me to tell them at work he quit.  


I went to work and he came into our home and shot himself in the head.  


The day day before we watched Judge Judy and ate ice cream.  We were married 47 years.  


I feel like I don't want to live without him.  I go through the motions of life, but my will to live feels gone.  I miss him so much.   

pahatfi
pahatfi
so sorry for your loss
Community LeaderShrn
Shrn
Oh Kathy, I am so sorry for your pain. I have never experienced it personally, but have talked to some who have. I wish I could help you with dealing with this loss complicated by his own actions. I do know what it's like to lose a husband after a long marriage. My husband was 60 when he died from lung cancer. I was lost, not sure what to do and what the future holds. Take care of you right now and know that you can always come back here and be understood. Hugs to you, Sharon
scottito
scottito
I never experienced suicide, and the trauma that must cause to those left behind. I understand it to be an inner mental pain so severe the death is the only perceived way to end it. And no person committing suicide is in their right mind. Those are my opinions based on zero experience, and even the so-called experts are guessing themselves. What is known is the selfishness of the person who takes their life without regard to the obvious devastation and trauma it causes their loved ones left behind. I would think there has to be support groups for suicide survivors. I imagine there would be one here on this site, better if a local group if that's even an option. My heart breaks for you. Just know, it had nothing to do with you. Nothing at all. I am so sorry for the pain you must be feeling. Remember, you've got to go through it to get through it. Scottie
EJ1
EJ1
Losing someone to suicide is the hardest thing I've ever had to deal with because suicide is usually a split second decision based on overwhelming feelings.
My wife was pregnant when she decided to end her life. The hormones from pregnancy and the medications she was taking for depression and bipolar disorder caused her severe psychosis. Had she waited a few hours that impulse would of faded, as would your husbands.
I know you're reliving moments and words, picking apart what could of been done differently but I promise you there is nothing you did or could of done to have caused or prevented this from happening.
I'm sorry you're going through this, I'm here listening if you need anything.
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