I have, thus far, only stated that my husband died suddenly in an accident. With some horrific things that have happened lately, and a serious need to vent, I must provide more detail....

My husband's grandfather owned a logging company, and my husband helped with that work since he was a rather young child. After his grandfather passed away, his uncle took over the business... but it was like a passion to my husband. We bought an outdoor woodstove many years ago, and we cut wood for not only ourselves, but many families who could not afford the prices charged by other suppliers. We did it because Shane loved it. He had a full time job, but nearly every day that the weather was under 65 degrees, we were cutting as soon as he got home! This coming winter, his uncle was to retire, and Shane and I were going to buy the logging business. My husband was thrilled with this, and I was happy for him. He was a hard worker, a great husband, an amazing father and a great man. He deserved to be doing what he loved.

In late December of 2014, he had two weeks off of work. And, as always, we were cutting wood every day of that. On the morning of Tuesday, December 30th, we set out again, with a couple of good friends. I could not shake a terrible feeling, though. I begged him to have just a small change of plans... I asked him repeatedly if we could cut in the fence row as opposed to the woods... He told me he wanted to do two loads from the woods and that we would then go to the fence row. Shane drove the bucket loader to the woods, and I rode with our good friend, in Shane's truck pulling the trailer, and we were followed by three friends in two additional vehicles. As we approached the property where we cut, I burst into tears. I told our friend that I did not think we should be there that day... I told him that we had been through so much, and always came out okay, but that I just felt like our luck was running out. When we parked the truck, I again tried to convince Shane NOT to cut there. I was unsuccessful. And less than fifteen minutes later... the love of my life, the father of my children, my everything... was dead.

He was cutting a huge Ash tree. It came down EXACTLY where he said it would (as always). But as it fell, a very large limb from that tree hit another nearby, broke off, and came down on Shane. It all happened so fast. There was nothing I could do. He was gone instantly. I remember screaming... I remember our friend dragging me away from Shane, and practically carrying me to the truck. Someone called my son and told him to get there, but he did not come to the truck. He parked on the road directly outside of the area where he could see our friends standing and ran in. Nobody stopped him. He saw his father in a terrible condition. I still can't sleep at night, and I cannot get the images of that day out of my mind. It is ripping me apart to know that my child saw that.

Since the accident, there have been so many issues with his family... the latest is beyond devastating. Shane's own father went to the accident site. He took pictures, including pictures of the limb. To us, that is horrific enough, but it gets worse. He made copies of several different pictures and has been passing them out to people like they are happy vacation memories. 3 different people who have received the pictures, were told, by Shane's father, "This is the limb that got him... AIN'T THAT COOL"

I flipped out on his family... my children are traumatized over the words and actions of their grandfather, as am I. We are struggling with this entire thing, and this is just too much. My kids do not want anything to do with their grandparents, as Shane's mother thinks that the behavior is acceptable. Shane's half sister also tried to stick up for the behaviors, and act like it was "normal". I will be honest... I no longer have any idea what "normal" is... but I am certain that this is not it.

Sorry so long... just needed to vent.