Widows & Widowers Support Group
This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.
I am new to this support group but I am reaching out for something that can provide some comfort for this unbearable grief I am feeling. My beautiful wife of 20 years died 118 days ago. She had been an athlete all of her life and up until the last six months of her life was a vibrant healthy 48 year old woman. She was having fainting spells and was seeing our doctor to try and figure out what was going on with her. One night getting out of the bathtub she fainted and fell on a small trash can breaking her ribs. She had a seizure and I called 911. The last think she said was "I don't feel good". She died the next morning from internal bleeding. We still don't know what was causing her fainting spells. I am 56 and never thought I would out live her. It is somewhat comforting to know I am not the only one who is suffering through this horrific time in my life. I am so sorry for the loss everyone here is experiencing but as many of you have said no one knows this kind of pain until you have walked in our shoes. I write this with tears in my eyes knowing I will never see her again on this earth. But I am hoping, God willing that I will see her again in a better place. I will need to lead a life that would honor her memory and I know she would not want me to suffer as I am but that is beyond my control.
I lost the love of my life and and high school sweetheart to lung cancer just ten short weeks after diagnosis. I found it inconceivable that this happened. I just couldn't comprehend he wouldn't walk through the door. Just take it a day at a time and some days moment by moment. Take deep breathes and be patient with yourself. For me, grief is like a roller coaster. Some days I just needed to cry most of the day, and that's okay. Tears are release of the emotions and important. My greatest sympathy for you and welcome to the group. Sharon
One of the things that helped me a lot was joining a hospice support group. It's free and open to all. My husband was not under hospice care, but I was welcomed with open arms. Being among others who understand, and being able to express your grief is important. I know there are several very good support groups in the Denver area.
I wish you peace and comfort. Take it a day at a time and be gentle with yourself. I am very sorry for your loss.
~Lori
This is a good place to come because everyone understands how we feel...again, I'm so sorry.
I still cry [it's been 26 months], I still find myself feeling depressed and deeply saddened. These feelings don't linger like they used to and don't last as long as they did! But, they're still here.
I'm hopeful that one day I will only see the joy, love and happiness that we shared and the sadness will just be candle flicker in my head.
I'm sorry for you loss and hope that your grief journey doesn't last too long.
Roz
Trying to cope is the hardest thing to do. I found the only way for me was to see my doctor. If not for him and the antidepressants/anxiety medications, I don't know what horrible shape I'd be in today. These meds i take daily and they help me to go on but you don't lose your emotional state, like feeling bad, crying, loss of appetite etc. But they do help to deal with life better.
It's very hard losing your significant other, your better half . It takes a long time to get through it all but i feel ups and downs and it'll be 9 months my husband has been gone this month. Some days are better than others but it is adjusting to this changed life that takes time.
I wish you the best and hope that you will find people like on this site to talk to who will let you speak out and talk about her if you want and that they will listen.
Peace be with you, somehow , someway. Take care and know that we know how you feel. It's a tough road but a step at a time is all you can do right now.