Widows & Widowers Support Group
This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.
Just got back from a10 day trip which was to attend my brother's wedding on the Saturday then scatter Bill's ashes in his home town on the Sunday.
I then spent some time with his family followed by 4 days with my best friend who also stays in his home town, we had such alovely time going over all our memories throughout the years it made me so happy thinking of all these times. We also visited some of our favourite places as the weather was great while I was away
When I got home to my empty house and no welcome home hugs from my darling husband i just felt so confused as to how I could be so happy with my lovely time away with family and friends yet so sad at not being able to tell Bill all about it..
I can honestly say that I feel like Bill is watching over me and giving me strength otherwise I would not be able to cope with all these confusing feelings.
My friends at DS have also helped to give me strength and I hope that this will help me to keep moving forward .
There comes a time when we get very tired with all the tears and sadness when we know that it will not change anything or bring our loved ones back so why do we keep doing it ? " Grieving is so confusing "
Thanks everyone for making the journey a little easier with all your support
Hugs to all
Pat xx
I then spent some time with his family followed by 4 days with my best friend who also stays in his home town, we had such alovely time going over all our memories throughout the years it made me so happy thinking of all these times. We also visited some of our favourite places as the weather was great while I was away
When I got home to my empty house and no welcome home hugs from my darling husband i just felt so confused as to how I could be so happy with my lovely time away with family and friends yet so sad at not being able to tell Bill all about it..
I can honestly say that I feel like Bill is watching over me and giving me strength otherwise I would not be able to cope with all these confusing feelings.
My friends at DS have also helped to give me strength and I hope that this will help me to keep moving forward .
There comes a time when we get very tired with all the tears and sadness when we know that it will not change anything or bring our loved ones back so why do we keep doing it ? " Grieving is so confusing "
Thanks everyone for making the journey a little easier with all your support
Hugs to all
Pat xx
Bill IS not only watching over you and giving you strength, he's there with you - maybe "just in the next room."
I have Darrell's picture on the entertainment center (and in every other room in the house!) and the minute I get home, I start yapping away, telling him all about my outing, just like I did when he was physically here. (And, just like then, I'm sure he goes to his "cave" - you know the one guys escape to when they're overwhelmed? :) ). Oh, by the way, I DO shut the front door first, so the neighbors won't hear - might freak them out! And, you know how crazy those neighbors are...
And, yes, grieving IS confusing - well put! Used to be we could define exactly how we were feeling and, unless there was an earthquake or something to change our mood, we could depend on feeling a certain way for a couple of hours, at least. Now...yikes!
Hugs,
Terry
Grieving is confusing and it does SUCK, but together we can make it more bearable....hugs
Maybe you could write a letter to your husband, and tell him about your trip, and how you feel. I have found this is good just to get it off my chest, just a thought, take care and try not to beat yourself up over being happy... G-
I can go and have a wonderful time, and come home and be sad that my sweet man is not here to tell all about it.
VERY NORMAL or else i am NUTS! what "I" do now? is to tell him about the trip ANYWAY. I mean I am not crazy that I know of ;-)), and i know he is not here, not comiong back, but still is in my heart, so I talk to him. i tell him about the trip, what happened, what made me laugh you know? and even though there is no answer back? I feel he hears me. that is how I cope sometimes..and mostly it works.
Confusion is so many of our middle names here. i don't know if i will ever figure it all out, or if anyone does....just know that if we keep on keepin on..we get a littel bit closer to feelin...OK, and then striving for that FINE.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=khrx-zrG460
HUGS of understanding...and hopes for more FUN trips in your future! Diane