I wish there was a box to check that says married but widowed.
I will always consider myself in my heart married to Ken. I whispered in his ear before they turned the life support off there would never be another and as our wedding rings say April 28'73 through eternity. Ken was my first love boyfriend I have no desire to have another although it does get lonely most of the time. We were just short of 38 yearscwhen he passed at 61. I was 57 wasn't suppose to be. My wedding ring will be taken off after I die and not before

We were married April 28, 1984, but had dated for 8 years, because I never wanted to marry again until my children were grown. We never lived together. When we married, I was a single parent with four grown children, 2 in college. Money was tight and we each bought our wedding bands for $99.00 each. We had a wonderful wedding at our best friends' home who had gone all out for us. We had a good life, bought a nice home and about eight years ago, he gave me a really beautiful custom made wedding ring. My ring has a story and whenever I look at it, I think about how blessed we were. We both were given a second chance at happiness after our first marriages failed. It is more than just a wedding ring to me and I will always wear it.

We have all had to deal with this at some point after our losses and it isn't easy. To stray a bit from this particular topic...when I was making the usual notifications to organization that handles my pension and insurance, one of the documents I received had a statement that read "you have recently notified us that your marriage has ended. Please check a box to inicate reason (divorce, annulment or death) and return this to us." The term "your marriage has ended" was a kick in the gut (like yep, I got that out of the way). Talk about unsensitive. Couldn't they have modified it to say "a change in your marital status"?

The first time I had to check the "widowed" box was an awful experience!! It just hits you "between the eyes" and right in the heart. Then, as some of you have said, some papers only have "married" or "single". I hated to have to check "single" ~~ then, I wrote beside it "widowed'. I couldn't just leave it as though I had made the choice to be "single".

Eventually, it gets a little easier to check that box. I still have a tendency to write in widowed. For some reason, it just seems better to me. BUT, that first time ~~ checking "widowed" was hurtful.

Legally, yes, I am single. In reality, I was a wife for over 38 years, and I am widowed. So, not by choice am I single. I know it is just semantics, but, that's the way I feel. So, it would be better to have: (S) (M) (W).

I was married just short of 37years. At the beginning I would say that I was widowed. Then I realized that I needed to accept the fact that my husband had died. Even though in my heart I will always be married, I had to accept that I was single. When asked I say that I am single. I no longer wear my diamond, I do wear my wedding band on my right hand and my family ring on my left hand.

Totally with Joely on this one.

I have actually drawn in my own box and labeled it "widowed". I know you can't always do that, but I sat there and just stared at the married and the single box.

.. legally single...for the rest of the world.... but for me.. i am always married and a widow.