While no one wants to be here, please understand that we all individually and collectively welcome you. Please do not think in terms of gender -- this is life and this is about one human being to another. This is a very difficult time and gender notwithstanding, the hurt and pain cannot be described adequately. You actually have to lose your partner/spouse -- whatever -- in order to truly understand the emotional roller coaster one finds oneself riding without buying a ticket!!! From my personal experience all I can say to you is that please post whenever you feel the need to say something or be heard or just to simply reach out. I have found many members of this board who are always here with a kind word, encouragement and just there to offer support with true emotional generosity. I am truly sorry for your loss! Blessings.

I'm so sorry for your loss. This group is great, and although most of us are women, I suspect there are a lot of men who read and rarely write. Still, you can't beat the help you'll get on this group. I lost my husband in March and many times I came here because no one else seemed to understand. Not even my father who is widower.

Hello
Welcome : ) There are no words to express the depth of pain we feel losing a loved one. I lost my husband in Sept my dad and a close friend in October. We all are on the same journey here some at different levels. I find comfort that we can express our feelings without judgement, in fact most of the time there are others experiencing the same feelings. Heartbrokin

Welcome to this group! It has been a life saver for me when I thought I would go crazy because no one understood what I was going through. Last week I really needed my husband like never before. I accidently ran over one of our stray cats that has been hanging out here for a couple of years. I LOVE cats, so I cried for hours, sobbing, and wishing for Joe to be able to hold me and comfort me. I went inside the house to scream and cry at the 4 walls. I don't name the strays that come to me, but I love them and feed them twice a day. When I buried the sweet little kitty, I named her Little Black Beauty. This incident is just another "first" following the death of my Joe. I have never run over any dog or cat in my life and I love all dogs and cats. I never thought it would happen to me. Fortunately, she died instantly, so she did not suffer long. I had to pray for hours to God for forgiveness for ending her life, no matter how accidental it was. Having my Joe was always having comfort no matter what happened to me. Gone with the wind..........................
Kathleen

Glad you decided to join. I'm sorry for your loss and that you had to find this site. The folks here are understanding and we all get it on the loss of a spouse. There are several guys here so we welcome you.
The folks here are at different times on thier Grief Journey and I for one get a lot of help from reading the posts and thier advise.
Dave

Welcome to a club no one wants to join but life throws a cruve ball and here we are. You are with friends here, we know your pain we understand.....So glad you decided to join in with DS.
Sally

welcome. I don't know how I would cope if it wasn't for coming here and venting. Just reading that someone else is feeling the same truly helps.

Welcome to our site, we are here to help and support you. I am so sorry for your loss, and I know that you are in pain. The anger issue will not always be there, but you will have to work through all the grief steps. They come and go. This is the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my life and I had a 9 pound baby natural, and thought that was the hardest thing I had to do, but how stupid was I. This grief is so emotional, and so hard. Give yourself time and be good to yourself. You need to reflect on those special memories, putter around the house, etc..what ever it takes to find peace. In ways of the picture, we like to see what you look like, so add some pics of you, and what you have is nice. Your Abby was a pretty woman. I hope you have a great day..Hugs~Shelley

Can you stand one more comment? Yes, put any picture up that you want - you can change it as often as you want too! There are no rules for those who mourn.
I'm with you - exercise does help. MIndless activity helps me. As to the anger... anger is part of this journey. As I navigate the waters I try to give every one a bit of a free pass once or twice for stupid comments. If they continue - whoa be to them. But really, does anyone know what to say? And truthfully, unless you have been on this journey, you have NO IDEA!
Keep posting - we are here (sadly)
Blessings,
linda

Welcome to the "club", we are a group of elite members. It is good to have opinions of both men and women. Cook? It is hard and I really need to treat myself better with healthier meals.

Dar

Glad you joined but really sorry you had to. I wish none of us had to be here, but DS has truly been a life saver (or at least a sanity saver) for me...
You are right that there do seem to be more women here. I am not sure why that is - women probably just tend to reach out more. But I think it is great that widowers are joining too and you guys offer just as much comfort, understanding and support as the women do. It doesn't matter what your circumstances, losing a spouse is a horrible ordeal and it is nice to know there are those here who truly understand.
Wishing you all the best,
Angie

My sincere sympathy for your loss, we do know how you feel in many ways. I welcome you to this site and hope it brings you as much comfort, support and understanding as it has brought me. Grief does not discriminate male or female, it is our cultural upbringing that creates the defines the gender and how they handle it. Of course, it's a lie, just because some are able to supress their pain better doesn't mean they hurt less.
When we first join this group we are apprehensive to share so much, pictures, feelings, circumstances but as we participate we find that it is through sharing these feelings that we start the road to our own healing.
Bless you and welcome.
Linda

I'm so sorry that you also lost the love of your life. There are no words that can help, but coming here saved my life. I don't know what I would have done had it not been for all of the understanding people here on DS when I lost my husband over 19 months ago.
hugs...
-Diana

just saying hi from another widower...

so sorry you had to join this club, but you are in good company....all have a good idea of what you are feeling, going through, etc....for myself I come in, lurk, read and comment if I feel it will do some good, I guess what I'm saying is: be yourself, share what ever you feel like sharing, change pictures, but the biggest thing is come in and vent if you need to vent don't stay away...hugs, Sandi