I have not been on here for awhile. I had horrible things happening here. Beside the lawsuits from my Joe's exwife and sons for money, someone turned in my tenant living in my basement here. Her rent was the only way I coudl keep my home. We had to move her upstairs with her son by me and I have to hire contractors to remove a shower, sink and wall my Joe had built for them.

I have not slept now in a week. All I day is lay awake and shake all night long. I am already on anti anxiety meds and they dont help at all now. It has caused my inner ear issues to go crazy and I cannot even walk at all, drive or do anything. I have all these things to deal with on my own while not being able to get around. These people will be living in my apartment now for a long while until they can find an apartment and then I have to clean out and sell "our" home.

My whole life is done. I dont even have the time to cry or think of Joe and I feel so guilty. I need him here so badly to try and take care of these things for me so I can just put my head down for an hour. My family is very busy with work, has taken off too much time already so I am alone in this matter. I told Joe I just want to get a shovel and lay down with him again. I cannot deal with all this anymore. Too physically sick and exhausted. One sound makes me jump out of my skin.
Please pray for me, my doctor said I had a breakdown that is why I just keep shaking. I dont know how to get over this.