It is a catch 22. I see a man in a truck with a camper and boat and I wish I could just run up and jump in. I want to camp, fish, sit by a fire and look at the stars. ( my husband was a huge fisherman)we loved the outdoors. I yearn for companionship, not a relationship just someone to fill in the blanks (does that sound weird?) I wonder how that would sound on a dating site? lol.

Love this topic. I miss holding my husband's hand, miss the sweet kiss on my cheek when I would come home. I see so many of us miss just holding our spouse's hand. In almost 100% of our pictures together, my husband had his hand around my shoulder. In all these years, never really noticed, but now it has my undivided attention. it is a warm feeling that he truly loved me always. He was a wonderul husband and my best friend. At ten months, no one has peaked too much of my interest. No one has come close to what I had.

I know that loss of closeness you describe. It came upon me suddenly after my husband died when I was trying to navigate over ice to cross the front yard and my SIL's brother saw me and guided me along. I was shocked at the reaction it left. There's an intimacy in everyday life that has gone. Another hurdle to get through. Be kind to yourself. Sharon

Oh! This topic is driving me nuts! Like many of you witnessed with your loved one's, my Morey was very sick before he passed. But still I looked at his blue eyes and found them so engaging. I looked at his hands [such masculine and well groomed hands], I looked at him with the very same love and admiration as I always had for over 40 years..

After all, he was my man. We loved each other completely.

I miss everything about a relationship. Most of all, I miss him!

Roz

Oh it is such a conundrum. We miss the emotional but we also miss the physical. It is human nature. Look at how babies are soothed and comforted by touch, it is as vital for them as food and water. And we miss a particular physical, THAT person's hand, THAT person's smile. How to cope?
Well, I complained about it bitterly, Lol. Got a lot of smooches from my puppies and gave them a lot of pets I also found massage therapy to be helpful. Offered to babysit anyone's child! (If there is anything more gratifying than holding a sticky little peanut butter fingered hand and walking down the street singing Hakuna Matata, I am not sure what it is.) All of this helped some.

I am very proud that you did not cry!
Hugs and positive thoughts!
Val

I miss it all also! But, after being alone for a while I began to wonder............is it the touch we give or the touch we receive that gives us the most pleasure?

Grab a pillow or something close by and give a squeeze, a rub or a hug. Hug your pet. I have one of those neck pillows made with memory foam and it feels like my husbands hand. Do what comforts you the best. It is so hard but we will make it. You can also make a pillow out of one of his shirts and give it hugs too.

I lost Gary in Sept. I miss his touch also. I hug his pillow but not the same. Wish had words of comfort.

Thanks for all the comments. I have a massage and facial booked for this weekend. I do sometimes sleep hugging a pillow. My dog never seems to tire of the attention and is always so happy to see me that I don't have that empty house syndrome as much. My 3yo grandson is also not opposed to cuddling so that helps! :) Liz

So many things we take for granted. My husband was very affectionate. I was not always. I sometimes think about when "I wasn't in the mood", he never argued or complained. But we would always kiss each other when one of us left home and when either of us returned. Each of us being married before, were together for 36 years and into our seventies, so we had become comfortable with each other without being intimate. Oh how I miss his kisses and hugs. He died in our bed and for three weeks, I never changed the sheets, I couldn't. I tried to hold him close to me.

My Ken will be gone 4 years March 12th. He was only sick 11 days start to finish.
I still so miss his hugs and kisses morning, when he came home from work, just because we passed each other and bedtime. I really miss hearing 3 little words I love you. Not bad for a married couple of 38 years.
I still wish him Goodmorning and night and tell him I love him. To a huge pictures the kids got me that was taken of him 2 weeks before he took ill.
Last thing I said to him was Good Morning Sweet Cheeks I love you. He had tears running down his face. Last words he whispered to me was I love you.
I tell our two kids to tell a person you love them as you never know if it will be your last time.
I so miss him

I lost my husband of 41 years in September 2014.
I understand how you feel. I'm not afraid of being alone, but I miss the good bye kiss in the morning and the " Hi honey I'm home" in the evening. I miss just holding his hand.

My husband died unexpectedly and I never realized how important just a simple hug was.

Please know you are not alone in your feelings.

I believe that it gets better with time. I read a study that says the brain produces chemicals of pleasure from those touches and when we lose these relationships, it's like withdrawls from a drug. The first year or so was awful for me. Now it's not so bad. No more skin hunger. I hug when it's appropriate, often in church and when I see friends and family. The intimacy of my marriage was awesome and like Russ, those memories give me comfort.

I'm more in Sandeestttn boat- our physical relationship had gone downhill years before my husband died last week, so missing that is not new to me. He would never cuddle in public, and I cried about that more than a few times.

But even though our physical relationship was in the tank, our mental one mostly wasn't, and I miss that a lot. Empty house, no husband to talk to - I miss that. A lot. And I cry every day, sometimes hard, sometimes not so hard, but I cry...

Liz I am glad you were able to write that without tears...I only really tried dating or whatever it was with one person...he is an amazing hugger...I had met him through online dating and lol I paid quite a bit for a two year service and I don't want to talk to anyone else ..my mistake was through texting and conversation I shared too much information about my sexual life with my husband...the things I like ..etc. During the last few years with my husband we didn't share the physical aspects anymore and it didn't matter...for some reason I thought that if I found someone new I would just let him know what I like...even though I'm not sure If I would like that anymore or even be physically able to do it anymore...I feel so immature on this whole thing To make a long story short he called me dirty...and it wasn't the good dirty or at least not how I took it...we..still communicate and that's only because I initiate it..lol Liz I'm so messed up on this topic...aww kiddo be careful..

I lost my husband 10 years ago and i wish that it was just a stage to go thru missing the hugs, cuddling and just having someone to tell you good morning or good night..to hold you when you have a bad day or take care of you when your sick...family is nice but its just not the same as having the one you love wrap their arms around you and hold you making you feel special..if it is a stage of grief then im still going thru it....I miss all of the above...This is one area friends and family arent able to help us with ...i do try to fill my days with work, family and friends but like you i so miss his voice, his touch and just feeling part of having a partner in life......This journey is long and hard but good family and friends can help..
Take care friend..Hugs for you.......