Widows & Widowers Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.

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kindredspirit
kindredspirit

February will be 3 years since my wife's death. Like many of us, I wonder if the pain ever really goes away. This morning I was watching a tribute concert to John Lennon. During the song Woman (which he wrote for Yoko Ono), the camera showed Yoko in the audience. The pain of someone who lost the person they love was written all over her face. I was struck by the fact that she lost her husband 37 years ago, and the pain was so clearly still there. When I think I am learning to live with this, something will remind me of my wife and bring me to tears. The feeling of loss is always sitting just below the surface.

MaryAB
MaryAB
Im so sorry to hear about your wife’s loss. I am also on my third year of losing my husband due to a sudden heart attack come Feb. I am currently new to this group and I am just somewhat rummaging to read through the posts here knowing that somewhere out there I get to connect with the same feelings of shall I say co-widow and widowers. These are feelings that cannot really be expected to be shared by a friend or family member who didnt go through the same predicament as we had. Of course we wouldnt want them to go through the same pain or process. I pray for your healing journey...
denverkim
denverkim
I'm new here, too - but only because I'm newly widowed. My husband passed 16 days ago. The overwhelming sadness is threatening to sink me and I worry that I won't be able to carry on sometimes. I've always been an optimistic, upbeat, "find the silver lining"-type of person. I don't know if I'll ever be her again. How do I keep this grief from completely changing who I am? Is there a way?

My heart goes out to everyone here. This is the club no one wants to join, but yet here we are.
Msbklyn
Msbklyn
You are absolutely right about the feeling of the loss always being so present. However., after 2 years I have learned that I can go on.. Not happily without him but I can survive. Time does help you learn to cope.
cgriff4ever
cgriff4ever
My husband has been passed almost 3 years in march. I dont believe it ever goes away, you learn to accept and compartmentalized some things that are painful, we learn to put them away, for when we are ready to revisit them. I choose to remember that my husband would want me to go on, and enjoy whatever life is left for me, on this earth. Remember, where they are at, they are not sad, but are at peace.... They remember us, and don't expect us to live the rest of our lives, crying, and grieving 24/7. I was one of those who thought life would never be good or the same. It is good now, not the same, never will be. But isnt what life is about,living, love, change, death and hope,..much love and hugs carla
shelda
shelda
Never leaves you. I wonder if life is about pain...maybe we are in hell.