I think the first time I took a picture of a headstone was for my stepfather. He had alzheimers. I put 4 in a single picture frame on his wall. He would look at it everyday and re-remember that his mother, father, stepfather, and grandparents were dead. He would then look at the dates. It seemed to calm him because he was worried that no one was helping them.
Since that I have taken several pictures of family that died years ago. I never can remember when they died, so I look at the pictures on my computer.
When my stepfather died we had family that could not come to the funeral, so I went back out to the grave and took a picture of the headstone and flowers and sent it to them.
I have not wanted a picture of my husband grave or headstone.
I don't think it is disrespectful, bad or strange to take a picture or want one.
Do what is comfortable to you.

I am not sure I understand the question, if you are taking a photo of a headstone, or a bouquet of flowers you had brought, I do not see anything abnormal about that.

I take pictures of a tree we had planted there with my brother-in-law family. They are far away so I send them photo of a tree, of some flowers I bring or plant.
It is totally acceptable, because the love goes on, our story continues, just in a different form now, still it is a story of my love for my husband,

Although I haven't taken pictures, I know others who have. I don't think it is disrespectful. You might find it comforting to be able to look at the pictures if you are not able to go to the cemetery, as in bad weather, etc.

I took pictures of everything at the funeral, including my husband, mother, father. I have them on a SD card, if ever I decide to view them, they will be there for me to see. If not, they will stay on the SD card in my camera case...I don't think its disrespectable.

I have pictures of Cliff's headstone. It is an unusual design and unusual epitaph, and our families are scattered cross-country, and now I am thousands of miles away. I guess having far-flung family made it not seem so weird to me. My family has been "bi-coastal" - i.e., on both the East Coast and the West Coast, for decades, so my siblings and I had to exchange photos of how our parents' headstones were done. I helped get my father's in CA, and then years later after I moved to FL, my sister had to have my mother's done, so we exchanged photos.

I will be visiting Cliff's grave soon, I will be traveling to Florida next week, and plan to photograph it as well as I don't know when or if I will get to see it again, and I want our sons to have some record of it.

Here is an odd thought for you: I now live in an English village, and our church is 900 years old. There are gravestones in the cemetery next to the church that are so old and worn that the names and dates are no longer legible. There were no photos to tell anyone now who is there, and probably not all of the church records are intact.

Maybe someday the pictures we take will help some archeologist/historian. You never know what the folks a couple hundred years from now will do....

Love and Hugs,
Martha

I have taken pictures of the headstone and flowers I have taken...never gave it a thought that it might be disrespectful. I drive slow in the cemetery and turn off the music in my vehicle to be respectful but even with that I heard on the radio of someone singing along with Christian music from a radio while at their loved one's grave. My opinion is that it is ok.

Thank you all for your comments. I don't know why I would think it was disrespectful. After I thought about it I remembered that years ago my grandparents took me to a very old church that some of my grandmother's ancestors went to and where they are also buried. We took pictures of their headstones and I still have them somewhere.

tlsom, I do the same thing. I turn down my radio as I approach the cemetery and drive slowly through it. It has a lot of hills so it's kind of hard not to go slow. Once I get back on the main road I won't turn my radio back up until I have completely passed the cemetery.

I took pictures of my husbands marker for his sister who lives in New York. I don't think its disrespectful.....she may never see it in person so she appreciated it. Peace....Colleen

I take pictures of my husband's marker and the flowers I take and send them to his daughter in another state. I don't think it is disrespectful and she appreciates it as she can not come very often.

I see nothing wrong with taking pictures of their headstone. I have taken a few and I took them when I had lots of flowers around. Jim's grave is in a Veteran's cemetery quite far from home so when I don't get there I have my pictures.

I'm getting ready to design and order a headstone for my husband, who died last September. I called a monument company and the owner suggested that I go to several cemeteries and take photos of headstones that had features I might want to incorporate into Steve's headstone. I was very respectful, walking between gravesites instead of right on top of graves, but I didn't feel I was doing anything wrong.

I also have taken pictures of flowers I have left at my husband's otherwise unmarked resting place, and larger scenes from the cemetery.

I don't think any of this was disrespectful -- it would certainly bother me if anyone thought it was.

Alice

A family friend took many many pictures at the funeral and to this day I dont want to see them. As far as a picture of the headstone or flowers do what feels right in your heart not what anybody else thinks. That is usually what is right for you. Gerald

What an interesting, deep, subconscious, question! It's not about taking the picture, but "why" you feel the need to. Is it that you are trying to hold on to a memory that comes from the heart? Such as: your flowers are a gift of affection to someone you love. Pictures are forever. So taking a picture, you are holding on to something you deem precious in your life. You are trying to keep it alive through the camera.

The subject of pictures becomes disrespectful pending on intent and usage. I don't believe for 1 min that there is any disrespect in your photos. My analysis is that you are keeping his memory through your camera. There's no wrong in that.

I have no problem with this and I have done it. Also went so far as to get the kids in the picture with Daddy. The new family photo.

Maggie

First off a picture is a permanent visual record (a moment frozen in time). If you take a picture of anything it must be a record of something you want to remember for what ever reason.
Personally I had the funeral director take close up pictures of my wife.
I did so because at that time she looked like she hadn't been sick a day in her life. She looked calm, peaceful and free of pain. I look at those pictures every day and when I go to the cemetery that's the vision of her I have in my mind. They help a lot to block out the last 6 weeks of her life.
As to the headstones, I went to cemeteries to take pictures and went online to look at pictures in cemeteries to find a headstone in the form I had in mind. I finally found one unexpectedly that wasn't in a cemetery and with a little modification I had what I wanted.
It was finally put up this last week and if someone wanted to take a picture of it I would be both humbled and flattered.
What's to disrespect. It is after all a Monument.
I may add to my pics (probably)

Best Regards, George