Hi Sweetpeas,
My best friend gave me a journal after my husband died. I did not start right away but one lonely day I picked it up and I began writing. I do not write every day but some days I write and write and write. I write to my husband, to God, to myself. What ever feels like coming out. I try not to structure it, just let it flow. I find that it has helped me. It allows me a way to express my grief that is personal to me. Some how it helps me still feel connected to my husband. There have been times when I needed to cry but somehow couldn't...writing in the journal has helped me feel my feelings. I have been told (and I guess it is correct) that you have to feel your feelings in order to move through your grief. So the journal is one tool that I use. I hope it helps you as much as it is helping me.

I have found writing in my journal one of the most important parts of this journey. Every evening before I go to bed I just let the words come....this is my ugly journal..... I let the pain write the words...half of the time, I don't even know what I am writing down. ...all I know is that I must get it out of me and onto the page. I keep a separate journal I call my memory journal. Every morning I write out a different memory of our 46 years together....a happy , positive memory.
I am sorry you have had to join us on the journey, but you have come to the right place. Everyone here knows , understands and supports.
Take care of yourself, be kind to yourself.
Blessings,
Sharon

I write briefly everyday about my day. Then I print it off my computer. I have a hard time reading my own writing. I've been doing it sick my husband got sick.

I don't write everyday but I do journal and find that it is helpful for me. I write to my husband telling him things I couldn't tell him before he died. I know that he knows everything I am writing but it helps to put it into words.
Cathy

I do not write daily, but I have done so at the beginning of my widow life, it was like a therapy. Great way of getting emotions and mental roller coaste under some control.
Hug

I also started writing in a journal. I just write whatever but I am trying to get things down about all the wonderful things[ not material things] our marriage gave to me. I so very much want to honor the time we had together. I also write down quotes that I am finding meaningful. "I could have missed the pain, but I'd have had to miss the dance" It all seems to help me. I like Lady101"s idea of having two separate journals because someday I hope I'll be done with some of these thought but I'll want to keep the memories and the quotes. Guess I'll buy a second journal. -Deb

I write in my journal here on WW. Sometimes putting your thoughts down really helps. Because I have been here a while no one seems to read my journals anymore though. I invite anyone to read them.

I write in my journal daily. I address these entries to my husband and hope that in some transcendental way he is hearing what I am saying and knows how much I love him now and forever.
Dorothy Joan

Hi Sweetpeas: I've journaled for many years, not everyday though. But when my husband was sick and dying and for a while after his death I did journal every day, sometimes more than once a day. I just "let 'er rip"....the good, bad and ugly...whatever I was feeling at the time. It didn't seem particularly therapeutic at the time I was doing it, but in looking back I can see that it was. I still journal several times a month and journaling has become like a best friend I can talk to about anything. I encourage you to take pen in hand and go for it!!

thanks everyone for your words of wisdom... it is day 2 of the journel writing, and so far, I've cried quite a bit while writing parts just to Mark.
Thats ok tho, I need to do this. I also include a memory of him, or us with each entry. You all have been of great support to me, and I'm so glad I found this group. May God Bless you All !

I started a journal right away,I just hope no one ever sees it I probibly will be committed.

Journaling was suggested to me shortly after I joined DS and I began immediately. It was one of the most helpful things that helped me to understand my feelings. I wrote almost daily for two years in the beginning to write my feelings (naming the feeling is theraputic), then letters to my husband and letters to God (I was pretty angry at God then). I continue to recommend it to others for consideration. You will either want to write or not once you try it. Different things work for different people. Sharon

I started to journal writing.... but got one line wrote...Having a hard time getting started, so many thoughts coming so quickly, my mind gets muffled.....

LOL, Dawn - me too. Sweetpeas - I started one a couple months after Joe died. The first line says, "I don't even know where to start". I type it out, because I can type as fast as I think. And like another poster said, it's been the good, bad and ugly. I try not to sugar coat at all - I mean, I am writing to myself, right?? Some days it's just a couple of sentences, other days a lot more. No structure, sometimes just rambling. This has been a lifesaver for me. I have to say, though - the first 100 pages? If I took the cursing out, it'd probably be 50 pages.

Awesome! Yeah...I learned some curse words that I never knew existed because they all came out early on in full cursing sentences. I shredded a whole years worth of old journal entries because after I got it all out, I never wanted another human being to ever see it. It really was aweful!! But yeah,......sooooo healing and healthy to get it out. If someone else saw it they would have knew I was crazy for sure and brought the strait jacket. I never saw a counselor because I knew that I had to get it out myself and knew that if I got in too deep (to where I didn't think I could pull myself back out) I had no problem seeing a counselor...but if one knew what I had written early on...they would have taken me away for sure. And then during the days when I had to come into contact with the rest of the world I held my $#!% together. Now I can only look back and laugh at myself. I don't know HOW I ever got to here really. Thank God I got here though....
love n hugs...
-Diana