I have found that it is not being alone, but being without him. When I am around others I am temporarily distracted, but I am not connected to anyone the way I was with him.

He was part of me and now part of me is gone.

I agree with all of that too. I found some people that I am comfortable around but dont want to asked to much out of them.

I agree also, its not being alone its being without him. After my husband passed I got a puppy to keep me company. He gives me a reason to wake up in the morning, he's someone to talk to, yell at, an care for. Our other half is gone and now we have to learn to live alone. Keep busy and get with some friends as often as you can.
Hugs,
JoAnn

JoAnn,
I do but that dont seem to help. We have dogs too. We just got a puppy in sept. last yr. All I think about is he dont get to see her grow like our kids. Thank you tho. Hugs Jaime

I have never lived alone before although I have been single 41 out of 49 years. Most of that time was raising my daughter after her father died or us living with my mom to help her out. When my daughter was grown, I always had a room mate. I thought I could never live alone, that I would be too afraid. But now, after losing the love of my life who is the only one I could ever truly be myself with, I have had no problem living alone. But as the others have said, living without my Lee is the worst part. The lonliness is suffocating. My psych ordered me to get a service animal and my cat has been my best friend. But true love is gone from my life and it is the worst I have ever felt.

in agreement.....am not lonely, but rather alone without Norm..............missing the relationship........L

I am pretty much alone since my Charlie died 4/9/12. We could not have children. My Mom lives an hour and a half away - my brother and sister both across the country. Didn't have close friends - Charlie and I only needed each other.
That said, having children and family close and lots of friends would not really make a difference. The only one who could cure my loneliness would be Charlie. Other people only fill the time for me.

Julie

I think its because we did not have a choice in this.

And the hand that was dealt whether a long term illness or suddenly was not what we married - our dreams and hopes whether spoken or unspoken were in our minds how we would live until the end of our natural lives. We did not plan this - and we were not prepared or given guidelines on what goes on next. We are all stumbling through our grief figuring out what next?

And we do not want what is next....we want it to be the way it was.
HUGS

It has been 3 weeks, and I really don't know how I am going to do this. We spent so much time together, never any company.

His memorial is this friday and I am in panic mode. Drove 20 miles today to find something to wear to it. I had a panic attack on the highway and did not know how I was going to get home. He was the one I would call.

I see no purpose in life now.

Peace to you
Dually

Being alone is so very hard. I just can't seem to wrap my arms around the fact that from now own I will go to bed alone, get up alone and come home to an empty house. Randy and I did everything together. I just really want my old life back.

I agree. This week it has hit me vary hard that I am all alone . I know I have kids but it is not the same. They cant hug me like he did and they cant tell me they love me the way he did . I my life suck and I want him back so bad . Thanks for letting me know that I am not alone in this.

My husband passed on June 4th 2012, it's been so hard dealing with this. Today I was talking to a girl at work who didn't know my husband had cancer and so I was telling her the treatments and things we had been through in the past 2 and a half years and it hit me differently. That he is really gone, he did everything he could to live and he died.
He is not here for me to talk to anymore.

My husband passed Nov. 4,2011. It is finally sinking in this is forever!! I am not going to
see him, talk, smell etc. forever. While he was sick there was always a time frame, when he felt better or came home from hospital but FOREVER is just to overwhelming.

When my husband was told he had only 3 months left, I went into shock and for the next few months I operated on auto pilot, never believing that he would really die. I am still shocked after 2 years that he is really gone and I will never see, hear or touch him again. It is such a dissapointment each morning that I survived to face another day.

It's hard. I always had my parents or my husband in my life. Then at the age of 53 I lost my husband, so I'm alone. Not an easy thing to get used to. I still have my hurdles to get over. And sometimes I think I'll never get used to this new life. I think the best thing for me is to make new friends. That's not going to be easy because I work strange hours.