Widows & Widowers Support Group
This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.
It's been a very long week. The co-worker on my team that usually handles releasing our software is on vacation for a month..so I get my job + his. Not something i can't do, but that means after working all day, wednesday night's at 9pm pst, i get to login from home and run a release until about 1am.. Since i usually get up at 5am, that makes for a very long day..did this last week..have it coming up again this week..
Doing this fun work schedule while trying to pack my house/get it ready for new carpet and paint In all the rooms.. Friday,after work, i still had 3 rooms to clear before Saturday morning when the carpet installers were due to arrive, sometime between 8am - 12 noon..i worked all night on this and had 2 of the 3 done at 1:30 am.. I decided to nap or i was going to pass out at this point.. Napped from 2am- 4am..got up and started on the last and worst room, my pc room.. 24+ years of collectibles/games/comic books( used to collect) 2 computer desks/tv, etc, etc.. Lots ofv stuff In my "man cave".. At 7:50 am installers have not called yet and i think i have 1-2"hours of work left..5 minutes later "we will be there inn 5 minutes" phone call received.. Took me another 1.5 hours to finish..glad they had other rooms they could do first..
Now i have painters coming next week..gotta get everything packed/stored in my garage over the next week..im so exhausted..
Decided to get out today, take a break.. Went to another of my wife's favorite restaurants today..another "first time alone".. That was sad.. Decided "im going to see a movie she would have wanted too see" and go tickets.. Gotta waste an hour, so i roam the mall.. Now I'm sitting writing here, because im sick of seeing all the could roaming around holding hands..
I think the exhaustion/moving stuff is getting too me bug time today + trying to do some stuff Melodie would have wanted to do today..just making myself sad.. Really wish must honey was sitting here holding my hand waiting too go into the theater with me..
Thanks for listening to my rambling.. That took 20 of my minutes until i can go into the movie..
Doing this fun work schedule while trying to pack my house/get it ready for new carpet and paint In all the rooms.. Friday,after work, i still had 3 rooms to clear before Saturday morning when the carpet installers were due to arrive, sometime between 8am - 12 noon..i worked all night on this and had 2 of the 3 done at 1:30 am.. I decided to nap or i was going to pass out at this point.. Napped from 2am- 4am..got up and started on the last and worst room, my pc room.. 24+ years of collectibles/games/comic books( used to collect) 2 computer desks/tv, etc, etc.. Lots ofv stuff In my "man cave".. At 7:50 am installers have not called yet and i think i have 1-2"hours of work left..5 minutes later "we will be there inn 5 minutes" phone call received.. Took me another 1.5 hours to finish..glad they had other rooms they could do first..
Now i have painters coming next week..gotta get everything packed/stored in my garage over the next week..im so exhausted..
Decided to get out today, take a break.. Went to another of my wife's favorite restaurants today..another "first time alone".. That was sad.. Decided "im going to see a movie she would have wanted too see" and go tickets.. Gotta waste an hour, so i roam the mall.. Now I'm sitting writing here, because im sick of seeing all the could roaming around holding hands..
I think the exhaustion/moving stuff is getting too me bug time today + trying to do some stuff Melodie would have wanted to do today..just making myself sad.. Really wish must honey was sitting here holding my hand waiting too go into the theater with me..
Thanks for listening to my rambling.. That took 20 of my minutes until i can go into the movie..
I managed to get the painting moved to next week...so i got a little breathing room...now i just need to try and get some work done each night..
I wish the people who do the work,carpet etc, would HELP you move the furniture!! It's such a ME world anymore, no one wants to help.
I don't do that, all i do is install carpet or paint etc.
I am so very sorry to hear you are completely overloaded and stressed out on top of it all. Please take care. Tell you boss you need a break.
If you feel sick, stay home (there are ALL kinds of being sick) and get some rest and work done too.
I feel for you. But i must admire you for taking it to the extreme and actually keeping up with it. You should truly pat yourself on the back as you have done and incredible job with the time you've had to do it.
Here's hoping all your dreams come true, my friend. Do take care and get some rest even if it's your lunch break, relax. I used to work with a man who would use an emply room in the office and take a nap. I would wake him when his lunch was over.
You are almost there!! Don't lose hope. You are a hard worker!!
Letty
Yes my boss knows I'm fixing up my house to sell..they are not yet aware of any future plans i have to move from the area, but until i have a job lined up there, that isn't a big concern for me yet.
They would have helped move things..for an extra $300..so i did it myself.. Now i really need to make more progress tonight moving things out of the room i stashed the stuff in ( the only room they didn't get get carpet)
I tried to catch up on a little sleep last night, didn't work on the house..my mind never settles down..i got about 4.5 hours or so..
The hand holding is a killer somedays... Habit makes me still reach over when i drive somewhere..
A restful night of sleep eludes me since Morey died. Now, he's coming into my dreams more and more and I'm loving that.
You're doing what needs to be done in order that your life be better for you. I get that. It must be done.
I can remember how we couldn't drive in the car together without holding hands....without touching each other. I miss that too!!!!
This is a long road that we're on. I wish you strength and peace as you travel the journey.
Roz