Aside from reclaiming the bedroom and bathroom when I got back from the hospital, things are pretty much in place. All her clothes are washed and hung up or in her dresser. Her side of the bed is piled in her pillows and my folded clothes that didn't quite make it to my dresser. Her toothbrush is still out, and her lipsticks are still in the medicine cabinet. I finally hung up her bathrobes that were on the bed. I'll get to this when there's a need, but there isn't one yet. Her daughter and our best friend need to see what they want first.

Six months for me on the 17th of September. The socks went to a family member as they are special diabetic ones and $19.00/pair, this person was very pleased to get them, Some golf type shirts went to a thrift store, the unders went in the garbage, everything else is here and that's just fine with me. While I was packing up these few things, i
found a penny, Pat's way of tellng me what I was doing was ok. There is no rush. Hugs, Wendy

When I got Todd's personal belongings back, I unpacked them and put them in the closet. We just moved here to the farm right before his second deployment and some things never got unpacked before he was killed. I felt the need to make Todd part of this house; to give him a home. I will always keep his uniforms..if not for me...for his children. peace..Kaaren

I'm at 1 1/2 years with all the clothes. If some family member could wear them, that would be nice. But no; everything is intact. Sometimes i think it would be good for someone to get use of them.

My mom cleaned my dad's stuff pretty quick after his departure, but i think she was trying to get the place tidy for when she checked out.

you are not alone. its almost 9 months for me and I have everything the way it was when he went into the hospital. My grief therapist says its ok not to do it yet. hugs Ellen

Marie,
Giving away your husband's possessions is on your timetable. If you keep them forever, it is your business. No one elses.

I was able to give things away with ease, as I knew it was time and I was being spiritually encouraged to do so. I did keep my husbands golf equipment and shoes and his bowling bag. They sit in the garage where he left them. I can't say it is my home, for it will forever be our home.

And I kept a few of what I felt to be his favorite items of clothing. I have taken most of his closet space along with mine, but there is a small section devoted to him.

These things make me feel better. It is our home and my business what I have in it.

Blessings, Debbie

My husband never got rid of anything. I think he still had clothes from his teen years so there is quite a lot to go through. I got rid of the things that were so well worn that nobody would want them then I boxed up everything else to be gone through later. Some of them will go to the mission as they should do some good for somebody. Packing away your spouses belongings is a decision that everyone has to make for themselves and no one should feel guilty for doing it in their own time. God bless all of us going through this together.

This is such a personal topic. I gave my husband's clothing away just weeks after he died. But I gave them to people I knw that could use them. My brother took all of his pants, my son took his shoes and a couple of teenage boys a knew took the rest. It helped me knowing where they went.

I had no problem with his clothes, but his diplomas and awards are a totally different story! They are all framed and there must be 30 of them. I can't part with any of them and they are taking up a tremendous amount of space.......

I brought all of Jim's clothing back from our home in FL and have moved what I brought back along with everything that was here into a guestroom closet. I am at 7 1/2 months and no where ready to "do" anything yet. I think that I will "know" when it is time but until then doing nothing is the best approach for me.

I found it very painful to look at Mike's clothes everyday in our closet, so over the summer, I chose to keep one of Mike's military uniforms, a suit, flannel shirts, all of his wool socks, t-shirts that I actually wear, and his workboots. It didn't bother me to give the rest to charity and his family because I'm keeping the ones with the most meaning. I have a small closet in a spare bedroom dedicated to Mike's clothes and my winter blazers. It makes me feel really good to go into that little closet, and I'm giving myself permission to have a full closet to myself without feeling guilty. Oh yes, I'm also mixing my clothes with his t-shirts in his dresser and that feels good too. I love wearing his clothes!