I am having trouble with being able to get angry in any aggressive way. I can't only express it right now through art and music. Unless I am verbal spewing in a post or a journal about what caused my PTSD. That I can do.

But the anger that goes with my grief, not so much.

Verbal abuse is still abuse. There is a big difference between being mad at the universe and verbally attacking another member or group of people. There are a whole host of better ways to express it than terrorizing the rest of the board. I think most people here try to cut each other some slack, but there is a point where it goes over the line and cannot be tolerated.

I prefer journaling my anger out, or putting on loud rock-n-roll and dancing it off. If that doesn't work, I punch my pillows. Gets it out of my system, doesn't harm anybody or traumatize innocent bystanders, and has the added bonus of fluffing up the pillows.

Remember, verbal abuse is still abuse. There's always a better way.

Love and Hugs,
Martha

@Rick On what planet did someone tell you verbal abuse is "the purist and least harmful expression of anger" because that's very asinine, the same as what you said about psychological...smh

I'm not here to stir up ish but that's just crazy! And I'm crazy with my MDD/GAD.

Would you really be ok with someone throwing daggers at you with words because it's the "least" harmful? I know I sure as hell didn't appreciate people in my life calling me ugly/dumb/a nobody and every other thing they felt like throwing at me! Which is why at 42 my circle is very small because I've had waaay too much toxicity in my life to last a lifetime!

Late DH never laid a finger on me but his words cut like a knife! There's no such thing as a "softer/least harmful" form of abuse.

https://www.healthyplace.com/abuse/abuse-information/types-of-abuse-what-are-the-different-forms-of-abuse/

Verbal abuse is an expression of anger. Anger is an expression of grief. Grief is an expression of loss.
Intolerance of the intolerant is still intolerance. With that said, I recognize that a line still has to be drawn by someone and that would be DS and CL's, and thank God it's not me. I've seen too much of the consequences of suppressing that anger. Anyways, I shouldn't expect anger management to be a primary theme here.

I worked for many years with multiple murderers, rapists, and every other type of violent person. I don't expect anyone else to understand my experience.

There is a gate between emotions and triggers, and the decision to act on that emotion or trigger. Mindfulness is that gate. It is to control causing more harm to others knowingly for the sake of acting out of the emotion/trigger, much the same way people preventing themselves from acting impulsively.

Rain. The psychologically skilled would agree.

I'm not good at restraining myself yet, but I try to practise it daily.

The folks you work with, there are some that are probably neuro-chemically imbalanced. But for most normal people they would have the restrain if given enough time to think over this.

You probably knew of the marshmellow test.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QX_oy9614HQ

Cute. I wonder how it breaks down by age and gender.

You can do some digging here:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stanford_marshmallow_experiment

Sounds like you worked at a prison. Anyway, when i get really angry, I cry. I guess a person does need some release before it builds up to the explosive point.

My FH did both - beat me and verbally abused me. It's been a long time ago, but I almost thought the verbal abuse was worse. Of course he didn't break bones, only put large bruises on me. Except the one time he tried to choke me.

No, a Forensic Psychiatric facility. Many a day I was thankful to have only been verbally abused. Your experience sounds horrible. But I received verbal abuse by relative strangers. When verbal abuse is from a loved one, or family member it adds psychological abuse to the mix which is far worse.

She: Sorry to hear about the abuse you're put under. Wouldn't wish that to the worst of my enemy.

It's okay. Not looking for sympathy. This was back in the 70s and 80s. I try to not have victim's mentality.

Also pertains to criminality.