Widows & Widowers Support Group
This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.
i was wondering how long the state of shock and disbelief/denial lasted? My fianc passed away unexpectedly 2 weeks ago and I have yet to really feel anything but shock and numbness since. I have moments of sadness but for the most part my uncontrollable emotions aren't really based on anything but disbelief at this time.
I lost my vibrant, full-of-plans, larger-than-life husband suddenly and unexpectedly in a car accident. I was waiting for him to come get me for dinner out with friends.
The first 1-2 months were upside down, and I just could NOT believe that he was gone. the first month is still a blur.
But I had to snap out of it when I started probate and dealing with attorneys, etc. Grim reality set in...
It's been 9 months that i lost my beloved hubby Don. For the 1st 6 months i felt like he was out of town or just not home for now. He would go out of town at times when he'd go off to a horse competition and be gone a weekend. Sometimes he went out of state to visit another horse trainer friend and be gone a couple of weeks. I stayed home to take care of the animals that remained here. But then it started feeling like he wasn't temporarily away and i knew he wasn't coming back. That is when i would and still do have meltdowns every single day. Some don't last very long, some last longer and bring me down.
I lost my hubby to lung cancer (twice he had it) and i knew he was getting worse but then he suddenly took a turn for the worse and died while i was in a panic trying to get him more oxygen from the machine and his sister was checking his vitals, his mom just standing there telling him to follow Jesus.
He took his final breath and I called his name, two or three times, thinking maybe he passed out. But i lied down beside him and put my head on his chest and didn't hear the heartbeat I used to listen to when I'd lie by his side. I knew he was gone but you just don't want it to be true.
I am sorry for your loss. I hope you find a way to grieve because I think we must in order to get to the next phase of our lives.
Take care. Feeling the loss of your beloved is a stab to the heart.
Talk to someone who you trust will listen and not interrupt or tell you it's OKAY, everything will be fine. Maybe it will be fine, but that time comes later.