Driveler where were you when I needed ya?? That's what I did - I got in my exercise running from side to side to make it even but I got 'er done!

MyRocky - thanks for the vote of confidence..3 Stooges indeed.

And Driveler I still have my bed. I took the advice of many widowers and chose not to do anything drastic for the first 6 months and thus opted not to set fire to my home :)

AND YES MARINEWIDOW - I know what a dust ruffle is. It's that ruffly thing that makes a home for the dust bunnies and eats my socks.

I'm at 5 1/2 months and find living alone a mixed bag. I have enjoyed redecorating our bedroom. It now is so girly no self respecting man would ever sleep there.... and I LOVE it. (Correct word, Debbie!)

Ol'Diz.... when I had my new bedroom furniture delivered, I had the delivery guys move the mattress for me to put the dust ruffle on. Worked like a charm!

After two years I have accepted living alone.. . I don't particularly like it, but I have grown to accept it. The loneliness is what I am struggling with but I have not come to the point where I just want an extra body to take up space. . I have enough dogs and cats that do that already. I just miss the companionship and comfort that I had with Wayne. I cannot imagine at this point in life, ever having that with anybody else.

Diz you and your dust ruffle make me laugh. . .Thanks I needed that today.

Carol

I applaud and commend your honesty!!! It's been five months since my husband passed away and if I were to be completely truthful with myself, I, too, am OK -- not enjoy -- living alone. Am I happy, NO. Am I lonely, YOU BET. Is it a little easier to spend the days at home just being -- yes a little. Do I want my husband back -- YES. Can I have him back -- NO. Therefore, my goal is to find some contentment with my new situation and status in life and try to go forward and someday be productive. Thank you for your post -- it made me own up to my own thoughts. LOL

I can live alone but I do not like it. I would rather have my husband here, like everybody else, but I have 2 teenagers and it can get hard to be the mother and father. I don't have time to myself, and when I do find time I love it. I must admit it. I do love to do things by myself. I love to putter around the house and do what I have to do. I miss having lunch with Tom when the kids were at school. On his days off he would take me to lunch and goof off. I really wish I could do that again. Hugs~Shelley

I'll be truthful. I HATE living alone. But, I can do it. As far as the dust ruffle thing goes though, I had to compromise the look a little and go for one like this: http://www.bedbathhome.com/7012/Wrap+Around+Dust+Ruffle+-+18%22+Drop.html

I understand what you meant and a small part of me finds being alone not a bad thing. I can do what I want when I want. I miss my other half; I miss the " we " of it all. Since that will not be again, I am working on me. And the dust ruffle thing ?? I did it alone on a queen sized bed but there was grunting and moaning and groaning.......and a wee bit of swearing as well.

This is my second day in my new apartment. I sort of love it. Like you, I'd trade it for my old life. But I'm already starting to enjoy certain advantages. For example, I'm decorating the place from top to bottom. I'm doing it on my own, without any consideration of anyone else. I get up when I want. Sleep when I want. No one to pass judgement on what I do. I'm sure I'm going to love living alone so much that I would never want anything else.

Its only been 6 months for me Debbie. But wow, I look back and see that I have survived and am living again. I remeber that horrible day in March and couldn't imagine living without John for so long. I'm doing it and doing fine. I smile and mean it now, have made new and better friends and life aint all that bad. I misss him, but I have accepted he is gone and isn't coming back, and I need to live until its my time to go home. I can honestly say that I am holding my promise to John, I have said a hundred times that I am going to make him proud and I know I have. Like you, if he came through the door, I would be very happy, but I can honestly say that I am happy again.

I'd have to say that I'm in the "hate it" category. I'm 16 mos into it and don't only miss Jeff and all that we shared, but I miss being in a caring relationship. I'm the type of person who absolutely LOVES surprises---if they are coming from me (ha,ha)--but seriously, one thing I really enjoyed was being able to surprise Jeff with something that showed I cared---a little something from a trip, or something I remembered him mentioning in passing that he liked--it gave me such a kick to see him smile and know I had something to do with it---that's something I truly miss---having someone special (other than my kids, of course) to do those types of things for/with. I find myself going into stores to look for something special when I'm traveling and then remember Jeff's not here to surprise when I get home. Guess that's a weird thing to miss, but we're being honest here, so hopefully it will make sense to some of you. I have plenty of noise and activity and chaos around with my kids, so I don't know what "alone" feels like now, but I have experienced the loneliness part. I'd lived for years by myself before and am used to being independent---I didn't much give that up when I married Jeff, so that part doesn't feel new. I still feel very connected to Jeff spiritually and in my heart, but I envy those people who have loved ones physically here to share those fun moments of laughter and spontaneity---that's something there is just no substitute for.

Just for the record Oldiz, I waited over thirteen months before I burned the house down. LOL :-P

Living alone has it's distinct advantages. I can do what I want, when I want or not do anything at all. Nobody interrupts me when I am talking. Nobody wakes me up to get a ride someplace in the middle of my sleep. If the house is to quiet I have all sorts of music or the TV to break up the silence and if it gets to noisy I don't have to go someplace else to find some peace and quiet. If my wing gets wet I can hang it from the loft railing to let it dry.

On the downside there are still a few moments when I wish there were someone listening when I feel like talking. For a while the loneliness seemed to be a crushing emotion but it isn't nearly as bad as it used to be.

Over the weekend I was thinking about how much things would have to change if I had a mate. A classified ad got my attention when I saw some paragliding equipment for sale. The seller had made a note saying there was nothing wrong with the equipment he was just getting out of the sport because it was creating family difficulties.

For the time being I enjoy living alone as much as is possible.

Dust ruffle. Interesting subject. Since I am the only one in my bedroom and don't particularly care about having one I have made the solution very easy, I just don't bother. When I get tired of looking at the bed without one I just make the bed up and let the comforter hide the bed frame.

We upgraded from a full to queen size bed about three years ago. Trust me, it isn't too big for me and the cat. I love having all the room to spread out. That is, if she's not spreading out. And we are not big people here.

Dust ruffle? I once had the comforter/bed ruffle thing. Hated it. The ruffle always shifted, and the comforter was too hot for sleeping. And you have to tuck the sheets under the mattress so they don't fall below the comforter. YUCK! Now both our bedroom and the guest room sport bedspreads. Much easier to make the bed in the morning.

And Diz, I see you still have your humor. Love it!

I still hate it. Today I went to town and had loads of errands to do. I had to go for lunch by myself. As I sat there and stared at the empty seat across from me, I had to fight the tears back and quick choke my food down. So far I just cant find very many good things about being by myself. Don't get me wrong, I am not about trying to fill that space with anybody else at this point and most likely will never feel like I should. In that sense, I am alright with being alone. It is John's company that I miss so badly.