Yeah I know how that works. I lost my wife in November last year. The last month has been hell simply from a loneliness stand point. People get bored of seeing and hearing you down all the time so they just dont bother anymore. I instead sit alone in my apartment wishing for a miracle that never happens.
I think its hard for people to assist you cause they dont know what to say or do. Its hard to tell you "It will be alright" when they dont even know if it will.
I have really found out who my friends are in this situation and its basically no one sadly.
So you have my sympathy I know exactly what you're going through like you the calls stopped.
*Hugs* Least the people in here know what its like cause others certainly dont seem to.

When your spouse dies, you get 15 minutes of fame. Everyone offers to help you if you need anything........"anything at all".........and some of those offers may even be sincere at the time they are made. However, very quickly life gets back to normal for everyone else and they move on to the next problem. People have their own lives and their own problems and their own responsibilities.

The people most affected by my husband death, besides me, were our sons and his sisters. These are the people that I feel I can still talk to about what happened. As for everyone else, well, I don't really expect that they would be as affected by this as we were. Everyone has an "inner circle" and those not within the circle move on quickly after the funeral.

That's why there are support groups and boards like this one, places where we can share our pain. And, if you are in the faith, you can always turn to God. Support is there, but it will only be found in a few places.

I am glad you found this site and hope find some peace and strength here.

Sylvia

Kurt and Luckydaughter thanks for the support. Im glad I found this group. How can I move on when he provided everything for my family. I was a stay at home mom. I have a 15yr old and an 11yr old while the others are grown they're the ones that are suffering the most. I have them schedule for grief counseling. He used to tell me its a man's job to provide and protect his family. Women keep the family together. Whatever was broke around the house he was very handy at fixing it. Something was wrong with the cars, he did his own repairs. Constantly people would say you have a GREAT husband or they don't make them like that anymore....smiling I would say I know.....He had a heart of gold and would help anyone.

Give yourself time. Our children were grown & out of the house. But, he was VERY handy, we do have that in common. Being overwhelmed, stretched beyond belief is how I describe adjusting to our journey. Ask other women where their husbands take their cars for repair. I found the name of the company who installed the furnace & A/C & called for a service appointment. Then when I needed a plumber, called that company for a referral. Notice work trucks in the area, get the name/telephone
number after inquiring @ that home if they were satisfied with their work.

Yes, others move on, resume their normal activities, lives. Ours will NEVER be the same. Try to find something positive each day. Rely on the Lord, He is faithful & will help us to succeed .
jdp

I feel as though i do not matter to anyone hardly anymore too..so i have had to learn to be alone and like myself and my own company.This site is a Huge help to my self worth..(( Hugs ))

GROUP ((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))

I just joined this group and I'm already getting comfort from all these comments. I lost my husband 4 1/2 months ago and I have a 14 year old. It seems life goes on for everyone except us. I lost my mom and my husband within 8 months of each other in 2016 and it has sucked the life out of my otherwise very outgoing personality. Some of my friends are worried about me, but they just don't understand this tremendous void and overwhelming sense of loneliness. I literally go one day at a time and just want time to pass quickly. The cold northeast weather and short dark days does not help. Life is not easy right now, but trying to keep the faith.

Any one have suggestions on surviving a bad day

I don't post or reply much anymore since the format change but this caught my attention.
I'm into 4 years and my perspective has changed regarding the basis of the this post. I think you will come to understand and realize that, your friends, relatives, and co-workers etc., that still have their spouses really have no idea of the depths of despair that a widowed person can reach. It's really not their fault; they can never understand until that time comes for them also. To me it appears that, for them, life just moves forward and that you will make the necessary adjustments. From my perspective now, yes, you will adjust, but depending on your nature, you may never be fully accepting of this different life that we now lead. The one certainty is that you are now a very different person with a much better understanding of empathy.
For all people, in time, this is inevitable.
Right now you feel abandoned and that feeling may remain for a long time, but bit by bit you will adjust. It's a survival instinct that we all have.

Regards, George.

Very well said George!!!!!!

George that's exactly how I'm feeling right now! But indeed you are right. Until they lose their spouse, they have no Idea what widowers experience.