Wrongful Conviction/ Injustice Community Group
For people and families who have tasted or advocate against the horrors of injustice
It really frustrates me how society does little to nothing about the radical feminist groups out there who either use false accusations as a weapon against any male that they dislike, or attack/threaten/assault any male who is falsely accused of even a minor slight against a female. Or about all the big names in modern feminism who openly make statements like how "all men are automatically rapists by virtue of being male", or that "there is no such thing as consensual sex and all sex is actually just rape". There are even some who insist that just looking at a woman should be considered rape.
I find it difficult to feel safe when society and mainstream feminism (who one might think would want to curtail such behavior among its members) do little to nothing to deal with the radicals. Society and the mainstream media always seem to try to ignore or brush the issue aside in order to avoid making feminists look bad or anything like that. Even in cases like the incident a few years back in South America where a massive mob of radical feminists violently besieged a church during some national feminism day of some kind. The clergy peacefully stood guard outside to protect the people taking shelter inside, and despite their peaceful resistance they were violently assaulted by the mob. I don't recall that getting much (if any) coverage outside of the video footage floating around the web here and there.
People are also always trying to dismiss that sort of behavior as not being what the majority of "real" feminists are about. That might provide some degree of comfort if it weren't for the fact that the actions of the "real" feminist groups who lobby for and get laws and changes made didn't frequently match up with those of the radicals. If you look at the laws and other things they lobby for and get to happen it's full of biased laws that unfairly strip rights away from men, or take relief services meant to help anyone in need (such as money for victims of war/disease in foreign countries) and get those services changed to be either exclusively for women or mostly for them.
I found out recently that in Itally there are even laws that prohibit men from getting paternity tests if they suspect a child isn't biologically theirs. And in the US there was a case where a soldier who had been held prisoner by enemy forces (somewhere in the Middle East I think) for over a year or two. Upon being rescued and returning home he was thrown in prison for not paying child support while he was being held prisoner since the laws that had been made didn't allow for exceptions in circumstances like that.
There are even laws in the US that force male rape victims to pay their rapist child support. Even if the victim was a child and their rapist an adult when it occurred.
It's just so frustrating how these radicals have so much power to abuse men with false accusations or violence and other means and society does so little about it. Often it feels like most of society doesn't care and would rather turn a blind eye to it.
I find it difficult to feel safe when society and mainstream feminism (who one might think would want to curtail such behavior among its members) do little to nothing to deal with the radicals. Society and the mainstream media always seem to try to ignore or brush the issue aside in order to avoid making feminists look bad or anything like that. Even in cases like the incident a few years back in South America where a massive mob of radical feminists violently besieged a church during some national feminism day of some kind. The clergy peacefully stood guard outside to protect the people taking shelter inside, and despite their peaceful resistance they were violently assaulted by the mob. I don't recall that getting much (if any) coverage outside of the video footage floating around the web here and there.
People are also always trying to dismiss that sort of behavior as not being what the majority of "real" feminists are about. That might provide some degree of comfort if it weren't for the fact that the actions of the "real" feminist groups who lobby for and get laws and changes made didn't frequently match up with those of the radicals. If you look at the laws and other things they lobby for and get to happen it's full of biased laws that unfairly strip rights away from men, or take relief services meant to help anyone in need (such as money for victims of war/disease in foreign countries) and get those services changed to be either exclusively for women or mostly for them.
I found out recently that in Itally there are even laws that prohibit men from getting paternity tests if they suspect a child isn't biologically theirs. And in the US there was a case where a soldier who had been held prisoner by enemy forces (somewhere in the Middle East I think) for over a year or two. Upon being rescued and returning home he was thrown in prison for not paying child support while he was being held prisoner since the laws that had been made didn't allow for exceptions in circumstances like that.
There are even laws in the US that force male rape victims to pay their rapist child support. Even if the victim was a child and their rapist an adult when it occurred.
It's just so frustrating how these radicals have so much power to abuse men with false accusations or violence and other means and society does so little about it. Often it feels like most of society doesn't care and would rather turn a blind eye to it.
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Here is my new brother, copper :) He's so tiny! Moo and Tuck were ok with him on first meeting. Rocket due to his severe aggression will never meet Cooper.
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https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTDeA9Wxg/
If the radica and man-hatingl feminists who commit these injustices and get these unjust laws passed really are as tiny of a percentage of women as most women/feminists insist, that is a bad sign. It would indicate that the vast majority of women do not genuinely care about these injustices and are fine with allowing them to continue, and that the number of women who actually DO care and try to fix the problem is incredibly small.
The alternative to that possibility would be that the percentage of women committing/enabling/supporting these injustices is actually quite high. If it weren't then logically these issues would be facing much more noticable resistance from the women who are truly against these injustices.
This all makes it that much harder for me to feel safe around women in day to day life.
The more I become aware of the term's wide usage, the easier it is for me to express it in front of media exposure in a normal, calm, peaceful manner. As a person with generalized anxiety disorder with social phobia, I am learning how to adapt in a social public situation to be comfortable, no matter who is present.
Women, in general, can be mean verbally and not be subjected to the same radar of dismay as men are. This pattern often takes only a single positive event to switch off, and, it takes me practicing in front of the mirror every day to relax the tensed muscles in my face, so that the tone of my voice and appearance is seen as more open, rather than closed off.
One person, one hand, one step, one word at a time, we can help make the change to a more level balance for everyone, no matter who they are, what they do, and treat each other with positive kindness.
Now I see the female teachers on trial for abusing male children....I think it is changing SW however unfortunately is take time and attention brought to a very difficult subject for those who have suffered these attacks... There are those lost in the cracks and that's lousy and sad... You coming forward and talking about some of what you have gone through is brave and I'm sure you'll be helping someone else who reads this.. Big hug for you...x
If I am anything, I am pragmatic and realistic.
I do a lot of work in prison reform and sex offender issues, including sex offender registration issues. I deal with the same problems regarding those issues as SW is dealing with.
These issues are the result of generational bias, bigotry, and public ignorance. The people who are obsessed with bigotry will never change their attitude. The bias that is passed on from generation to generation will change in time, but it will take several generations. Public ignorance can be solved by educating the public and that is the quickest method of reform.
Since things will not change any time soon, we cannot change the situation. And since the situation cannot be changed, we have to change ourselves or look at the situation a little differently so we can survive. There is no real alternative if we want any happiness.
We cannot be in a situation where "we cannot see the forest for the trees."
This was what I was forced to do---to change myself. I finally realized that life was going to go on whether I was bitter or not, and if I stayed bitter, life would pass me by. I could go on being bitter, but I decided to join life again.
Of course, that is easier said than done. It took me a decade to come to that conclusion. This is why I think time is the best healer.
I fully understand what people are going through when they suffer an injustice. The emotional pain is horrific. And trust me, I am the biggest supporter these people will ever have. I know injustice---I lived it.
I fully support others who are suffering an injustice and I always will. But it is important for those suffering to find a way to be happy.
I was in prison. I hated it. I was not even guilty. But I found a way to "make my own happiness" while I was in there. I got a job as a tutor, was promoted to a great job in education and learned a lot about computers. I tried to make the best out of an awful situation.
Sometimes we have to make our own happiness.
How do we do that? It depends on the individual situation and there is no right answer, but the first thing is to realize your core problem and then look for ways to mitigate your suffering. You have to do the work because trust me, nobody else cares.
This is a support forum and I am glad that Jan created it. It is new and not very active, but there is definitely a need here. Most of the people here have problems that are very new and their emotions are raw. It will take time, but I implore you, at some point, to try different avenues that will make you happy.
Things WILL get better, I can assure you of that. We all need to hold on to that hope.
HOPE is a funny thing. Sometimes we expect hope to be staring at us, right there where we can see it, but hope sometimes is hidden. We have to look for it. We have to do things to bring the HOPE out of the dark into the light where we can snatch it and hold on to it. There is ALWAYS hope, but we have to find it.
Keep the faith.
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I can only try and think about how it might feel as a loved one as this has never happened to me.. Injustice is a terrible thing that quite often the general public seldom believes even happens and thus it makes strides that much harder to make... I think 50 years from now we will be that much further ahead and one thing that I think is really important is that people aren't hiding in the closet as much... I'm so thankful for people like you rew... You are making a big difference in this world with your pain... It must be very hard and I applaud your courage...x
That is not what I was referring to at all. I know right now that you cannot "pull yourself up by the bootstraps" because you are in so much emotional pain and confusion that the situation has overwhelmed you. These situations are not situations in which you can just pull yourself out of it no matter how brave or strong you are.
This is what this support forum is for---to come here to explain our problems, to vent, to cry, to know that you can "be who you are" without being ridiculed. This forum is a SAFE place to talk about our problems.
Talking is therapeutic. Just know others care and are in the same boat reduces the loneliness and isolation which is so destructive in these situations. Just knowing you have a place to go where friends will understand is priceless.
I am thankful for this forum. I am thankful for the people here. I am thankful for life.
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I agree, Jan's starting this group has been awesome. New things take time to catch on, and people are afraid of being judged for their experiences due to previous experiences. My reason for being here is to build on the calm method of coping with the feelings, the thoughts, the sensations to a better level for myself and those around me.
I've always tried to learn and adapt from past mistakes. I've tried taking the social advice of others, self help guides, forcing myself to be more outgoing and accepting more invitations to social activities, etc. However, it always seems to come down to people (almost exclusively women) being creeped out or somehow offended by me being a quiet introvert who has to conserve energy used in social situation, or by my ptsd symptoms (specifically periods of dissociation, flashbacks and being extra jumpy).
Do you know what it's like to have women explain to you that girls/women tend to find those characteristics creepy and that having them therefor justifies their abusive behavior towards you?
It's a bit hard to try to be happy and enjoy life the way you're expected to when you have so much hate and animosity directed at you 24/7.
Also, in almost 30 years I have not noticed many changes for the better in how society handles these issues. Sure there are more groups putting out information about disabilities and mental illness, but there doesn't seem to be any noticeable increase in people who actually care about these issues, much less actually understand them. If anything I've seen an increase in the number of people who make fun of and/or ridicule those with disabilities or mental health issues (largely because they now know a tiny amount about them from stereotypes and such, but have no interest in learning or understanding anything about the conditions).
It hurts when you're forced to turn to support groups in order to get any support at all, only to find that the abuse and attempts to silence or devalue how you feel is present there as well.
I feel very conflicted about all of this. It doesn't feel right or appropriate to feel resentful towards them given how much abuse/trauma they have or are enduring. But at the same time it hurts to have the actions of my abusers defended and be treated as though I don't have a right to feel upset or complain about being abused.
The fact of the matter for me is that we can all suffer from different things... Perhaps if you want to vent on that board you could tell your story and what you've suffered personally as opposed to making it about a radical groups do... Just a thought if you do want to reach out for support....I think telling a story from "I am" as opposed to "You are or They are" makes it personal and not about attacking another... I hope I'm explaining myself okay... I do support you ...and I'm giving you a big hug of comfort
When I first came to DS, I went to PTSD board, and got my feelings handed to me on a firestorm. I learned a lot from that experience, and I hope that you are able to find the good in this sharing.
Yes, I have read some of the posts on other groups and it is just dreadful at how some of the posters treat each other. Daily Strength is a support site, but some of these people have seemed to have forgotten that and I even think some have lost their humanity.
If a person cannot show compassion to the downtrodden, what kind of person is he or she anyway? That is how I feel about posters that ridicule other posters. We all feel downtrodden at times.
SW, you said, " plenty of people in the other groups I've looked to for support are surprisingly hostile if any mention is made of how radical feminist groups can actually be quite abusive towards men."
Well, they are just stupid then; it is true that some of the radical feminist groups are hostile toward men. Don't allow them to tell you otherwise.
Your feeling are YOUR feelings; they are valid and they are just as important as anyone else's feelings. YOU matter. YOU count as a human being. Don't allow those sub-human beings to get you down.
Whatever you do, do not allow them to take your dignity or your worth as a human being. Nobody can take your dignity unless you allow them to. Don't allow them to do that.
You have every right to feel upset when they upset you, and you are my friend. Just because they are suffering an injustice themselves does not give them a license to upset others or treat them harshly.
We all care about you.
This forum is important and EVERYBODY IS THE SAME HERE. We are all equal here.
None of us have all the answers or we wouldn't be here. We all come together to pool our thoughts for solutions. EVERYONE brings something to the table here and hopefully, we can learn from each other.
Keep your chin up. Demand to be treated like a person.
Please keep in touch with this group. We need you here, as your input is very important to us.
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