Stillbirth Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have been impacted by a stillbirth. A stillbirth occurs when a fetus which has died in the uterus, during labor, or during delivery exits a woman's body. For help and support, share your experiences and learn how others coped. Don't forget that you are not alone.

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4 Years since I lost my baby

SophiasMom2010
SophiasMom2010
Hey Ladies,

Tomorrow will be the 4th anniversary of losing my baby girl Sophia Grace Newell. I'm not sure how to feel, as usual. I lost my rainbow baby a year after Sophia and since I have been dealing with infertility issues. I'm still a mommy without a baby today, but I am a much stronger woman.

In the time since I lost my baby I have dealt with so many issues I never even considered would be a part of my life. I experienced the near loss of my relationship with Sophia's daddy because neither of us could deal with what happened, I became very sick from stress and hormones and I have learned how to rebuild a life from scratch. I always used to say, "I couldn't deal with it if something happened to my baby, I think I would kill myself" in a flippant way before I lost my angel, it's not something I ever really thought could happen TO ME. It's an attitude I still see in so many women who still get to exist in that world of denial, women who have never looked at their child in a coffin.

I truly believe women like us are touched in a special way by God, even as we are also touched by tragedy. We have all been to depths of emotional loss and pain that most people never experience in their lives, and knowing women here on DS and seeing them still learn to live on after these catastrophes is truly inspiring. I love all of you like my sisters and I want to say THANK YOU for all your strength and support and for being there and for allowing me to come here and be crazy and angry and hurt. Thank you for helping me to see that I am not alone.

I remember coming here 3 months after losing my baby, I was trying to deal with Christmas and I could not understand how anyone expected me to have a holiday celebration when I was barely able to muster the energy to wash dishes. At the time I could not imagine living again, I couldn't imagine that I would make it another week, let alone four years. And now I'm here, still healing, still missing my baby girl more than I ever knew I could miss someone, but I am living again, and I can laugh and have good days along with the bad. For all the angel moms who are just starting in this journey I want you to know there is a light at the end of this, and I know it doesn't seem like it but you can and you WILL survive this.

I love you all. And I love you too Sophia Grace Newell, my beautiful little baby girl.

Please post your own experience, story, poem, quote or just your baby's name and birthday in memorial, I just want to be reminded I'm not alone today.

*HUGS*
SophiasMom2010
SophiasMom2010
Sophia Grace Newell was born on September 17th, 2010 to Juniper Nua Dyer and Anthony Curtis Newell in Portland Oregon, USA. Even though she was born sleeping, she left a huge impact on our lives in good ways and bad. Every single night her mom and dad look at the stars and blow a kiss to the brightest one, because that's the one that reminds us of our baby girl.
Antoi
Antoi
Ben was born on the 6th of May 2014 to Antoinette & John O Connell I pray to my little man every single night and hope that one day I will meet him open armed in heaven. He was our first baby but I know he is in a good place and he is watching over his mam and dad. Xxx
Celian
Celian
Wow, four years is such an achievement, and your love for Sophia Grace has not diminished one bit, if at all it is just growing, and the experience is growing you too - i wish you could have grown in different circumstances, but at least you haven't let these destroy you. You are a warrior mama..and I pray God will reward you for holding on so strong! Thank you for encouraging me to keep going, I hope I will make Sinza as proud of me as Sophia Grace is proud of you!
If you are so inclined, may i suggest a blog post for you to read? http://kellyneedham.com/2010/07/18/faith-in-difficult-times/

Celian
MalaysiaMaysMommy
MalaysiaMaysMommy
Malaysia May Drummer was born on February 12, 2014 to Lauren and Ryan Drummer. She weighed 6 pounds, 5 ounces and was 20 inches long. Words can not express the love that her daddy and I have for her. She will always be our first baby, the one who made us parents, the one who change our life forever.
MalaysiaMaysMommy
MalaysiaMaysMommy
June, you have been an inspiration to all of us on here. You have showed us that we can survive this. Sophia Grace has one strong momma and I know that she is proud of you.
ValeriaMaria
ValeriaMaria
Valeria Maria Nogueira, Stillborn May 7, 2014.Little sister to Scarlett Sofia, Daughter to Scarlett and Carlos Nogueira. Valeria will always hold a place in my heart. Thank you sophia's mom for giving us light at the end of a very dark tunnel. Sometimes i feel i can't survive and then i look into you strong women. Thanks again for all of you that bring me hope and strength. I couldn't do with you girls. Thanks.
sdlutz11
sdlutz11
Kayleigh Jordan Lutz. Stillborn July 4, 2014 at 7:50pm in Tampa,Fl. Daughter, and first born to Sarah and Alex Lutz. So tiny were your little hands and feet baby girl but the impression they left were much much greater. You taught us that life is just way too short to worry about petty. I ask God everyday to bounce you on his knee and wrap you in his loving arms like mommy and daddy would have and tell you all about the love that made you possible. I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, As long as I'm living my baby you'll be.

All the angel mama's here have helped me everyday. Knowing I can turn to you ladies and say how I feel without getting a blank stare in return has helped me get through a lot of days. Thank you, all of you for being there for all the new and old angel mommy's out there.
Marthar1201
Marthar1201
Eli Roberto Samano was born May 29, 2014 @ 9:10 am... weigh 3 pounds and was 16 inches long. Eli was the first born of Martha and Roberto. Eli made me the happiest mother in the world the little time that he was here with me. Mommy and daddy will forever love and miss him. I pray every night, To God, Jesus, the virgin Mary and my grandmother r.i.p to take care of him the same way I would've taken care of him.

Thank you angel mommies for all your support and for sharing your angel's story. My hearts and prayers go to all and each of you. Stay strong ladies.... so that I can also have someone to hold on...
AngelBunnyDanniJo
AngelBunnyDanniJo
I have not been on this site in a very long time, nor do I know what prompted me to come on tonight. I remember you and the story of your little angel. I had lost Dannijo shortly after you and came here for the same reasons. Thank you and all 5 he other angel mom's that are here. To those that are here now, she is right. I'm sorry that you have come here, but there is light and the women and men you will find here are amazing and offer the best support. Love, hugs and prayers to whatever you believe in to all.
deleted_user
deleted_user
October 21, 2008 my Adam was born. He changed my life forever. The 21st is fast approching an I'm having a hard time this year. I'm not sure why this year it's harder. I would not take back any of the time we had together. I'll never be the same.
Thurman421
Thurman421
Lochlan William Thurman. Born February 25, 2014. 7 lbs 8oz. 21 inches long. He was born sleeping 6 days before his due date. The cord was wrapped 3 times around his perfect neck. I tell myself that we made such a perfect child that God wanted him, he had nothing to prove here on Earth. Sometimes I even believe it.I remember the calm and peace I felt when the angel came totake him to heaven.it was the night before I thought something was wrong. Im still struggling to find acceptance
deleted_user
deleted_user
Riley Nikole Fortune born Sept. 25,2010 to Janay and Randy Fortune. The past four years have been up and down for me. Remebering the night you came with the cord wrapped around your neck and leg and me not knowing how to react. Just feeling numb. I miss you everyday and kiss your picture every night. You now have a little brohter Mason that I know God took you home to look after him. I know you two would have been the best of frieds. Missing you more then ever.
Rochelle43
Rochelle43
My little angel Cameron was born sleeping January of 2000. Fourteen years have gone by, and he's still held dearly in my heart. Life has gone on. The light started to shine again in my life, but his memory lives on and he will not be forgotten.

God bless all you angel mommies out there:)
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