Spouses of Transgender Community Group
Being transgender it's not easy but neither for their spouses. This group is created with the intention of helping and getting to know others that are in. the same situation or to just educate those that are on the other side of the fence and want to know how does it feel or how would it feel to be a spouse of a transgender person. The main objective of this group is...
My partner has decided again that he's not trans anymore. He says that the major things about being trans don't fit, so he's not going to label himself as that anymore. I won't be surprised if he goes back to being trans in the future. Last time it only lasted a couple of months. This time seems a bit different, he says he's in a better frame of mind, and seeing things more clearly. He's happier, and has quit seeing his therapist for now.
I won't be obsessing over the fact that he might still be trans or worrying about the future, but it'll always be there in the back of my mind. I hope everyone else here is doing ok with everything. It's a hard journey no matter where abouts you are on it.
My partner too doesn't 'fit' in the major trans things. None of that 'born in the wrong body' stuff, and neither of us think he has a female brain. He likes male company (mostly) and male pursuits etc. He didn't have a difficult childhood or puberty.
Would your partner fit into the 'gender fluid' category maybe? It sounds like it could be a possibility. I still feel my partner is. He's been on hormones for nearly 3 months and is actually finding things quite comfortable now - enjoying being a male with female aspects. So far absolutely no desire to take things further. He is not really cross-dressing any more (just the underwear). Somehow the 'inner female' (with breasts) seems to be enough for him.
Gender fluid people may just be happy flitting between gender identities, which can be just inner, or with cross-dressing when they feel like it. Some may do hormones (like my partner is) others may not need to. Accepting who they are can be enough.
I wish you luck - and patience! It can't be easy to have things change all the time. I hope you can both find a place you are happy with together.
Much love xxx
I've heard of this yoyo business. It worries me. Personally, I'd be satisfied if it lasts a long while with the blessing of a therapist.
Wondering if there are folks where they essentially wait out the dysphoria (assuming it's episodic) rather than medically transitioning.
I think that if you ask the trans community they will say that once trans, always trans, because apparently cis people never question their gender. You don't hear the other stories because once they've got their feelings sorted out they go back to whatever was normal before and leave the trans community. My partner deleted his Reddit account and doesn't look at trans stuff anymore, so at the moment that part of his life is hidden.
I'm glad your partner has stepped back, YS. He really COULD be one of those rare beings, someone for whom being trans is a 'phase' a fleeting thing. Someone who changes his mind, or detransitions (even though he hasn't actually transitioned).
I wish you both the very best.
Much love xxx