Sexual Abuse Support Group
Sexual abuse is a relative cultural term used to describe sexual relations and behavior between two or more parties which are considered criminally and/or morally offensive. Different types of sexual abuse involve: Non-consensual, forced physical sexual behavior such as rape, incest or sexual assault, or psychological forms of abuse, such as verbal sexual behavior or...
so today i took another step... i didnt want to tho... but i had 2... me my friend and her bf went 2 a job interview with her... but me and her b4 waited in the car... i have tried my hardest not 2 b alone with a guy since... what happened wen i was little... but i couldnt tel her i was unconfortable, cuz then she would ask questions... so i stayed, i started having an anxiety attack (thank god he didnt notice) i was so scared... i mean i trust him and all... its just... it brought back so many memories... but i ended up not totally freaking out... i was scared at first cuz one of the first things i said accidentily had to do with sex... because i was texting my friend trying 2 distract ymself and he said "what r u doing?" and i said "sexting... when i mean texting... so then i was really freaking out... but after a few minutes i calmed down... i was so proub of myself... but i was also so scared 2...
I know that I just did something the other day that went COMPLETELY against everything my childhood abuse programmed me to do and it was hard as hell! And the aftereffects of that really threw me for a loop. BUT, I did it!
So, what say we both do a Happy Dance and treat ourselves for the baby steps forward? (tho really NOT such small steps! Quite LARGE ones, actually!)
i use to freak out when it was just my boyfriend and i in his living room...doesnt it feel amazing to overcome a fear like that?