Sex / Pornography Addiction Support Group
Sexual addiction, also sometimes called sexual compulsion, is a form of psychological addiction to sexual intercourse and other sexual behavior.
Well I tried it, I tried not checking in and it wasn't the right thing to do.
So if you're wondering if checking in is the right thing or not, I am here to tell you it is the right thing to do.
I stopped checking in for about a week, deleted my account, thought the sexual addiction was no big deal, and really got sideways.
I returned to my inner circle behavior, but now am happy to say I have more info on who I am and who I thought I was.
I am a compulsive sex addict, I am a compulsive masturbator who can become delusional when not doing the right thing. I do not have the willpower to not do these behaviors and if they continue they will lead to misery, harm, and dysfunction. There is a higher power who rewards me for not acting out, and that reward is better than anything material or society given, it is a reward of clarity and spirituality. If I decide to be guided by this higher power I experience dreams and a life I could never have imagined on my own.
I have character defects like a desire to control everything, an attitude of entitlement, selfishness, and feelings of superiority mixed with inferiority that make for bad business and harm my fellow man and woman. I also generate emotions such as jealousy, envy, hate, anger, fear, make my self lonely from self-pity, and think in terms of grandiose rationale.
Each and every time I function in these character defects I make life worse for myself and others.
I need humility in order to honestly ask God to remove these defects of character so I can treat him and his children better.
I then am given the power after asking for the humility an the help to do better, and I then use my newly acquired healthy willpower to do the right thing as much as possible if not always.
I then stay on guard and watch out for the return of my character defects if God hasn't seen fit to remove them quickly, and I pray and meditate to receive his will for me and others so I can help as much as possible.
I then pass along the message that life is not a dead end and there is hope and we can recover.
It's nice to be back.
Hope you all have a great day.
So if you're wondering if checking in is the right thing or not, I am here to tell you it is the right thing to do.
I stopped checking in for about a week, deleted my account, thought the sexual addiction was no big deal, and really got sideways.
I returned to my inner circle behavior, but now am happy to say I have more info on who I am and who I thought I was.
I am a compulsive sex addict, I am a compulsive masturbator who can become delusional when not doing the right thing. I do not have the willpower to not do these behaviors and if they continue they will lead to misery, harm, and dysfunction. There is a higher power who rewards me for not acting out, and that reward is better than anything material or society given, it is a reward of clarity and spirituality. If I decide to be guided by this higher power I experience dreams and a life I could never have imagined on my own.
I have character defects like a desire to control everything, an attitude of entitlement, selfishness, and feelings of superiority mixed with inferiority that make for bad business and harm my fellow man and woman. I also generate emotions such as jealousy, envy, hate, anger, fear, make my self lonely from self-pity, and think in terms of grandiose rationale.
Each and every time I function in these character defects I make life worse for myself and others.
I need humility in order to honestly ask God to remove these defects of character so I can treat him and his children better.
I then am given the power after asking for the humility an the help to do better, and I then use my newly acquired healthy willpower to do the right thing as much as possible if not always.
I then stay on guard and watch out for the return of my character defects if God hasn't seen fit to remove them quickly, and I pray and meditate to receive his will for me and others so I can help as much as possible.
I then pass along the message that life is not a dead end and there is hope and we can recover.
It's nice to be back.
Hope you all have a great day.
Everyrhing can be taken from.a man but one thing - the last of human freedoms - to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way - Viktor Frankl
When we are no longer able to change our situation, we are challenged to change ourselves - Viktor Frankl
Self actualization is achieved by a small number of people because most are stuck pursuing and satisfying the lower needs: physiological, safety, love and esteem - Abraham Maslow
If someome cannot find meaning in his life, he will ultimately perish - Viktor Frankl
He who has a WHY to live for can bear almost any HOW - Nietzsche
When we change the way we look at things, the things we look at chsnge - Wayne Dyer
Meaning is everything, we are to seek our own way of experiencing and trusting in an ultimate meaning that one may or may not call God. The truth - that love is the ultimate and highest goal to which man can aspire - Viktor Frankl
Enough said,
Wolf
Personally, I found it helpful not to define myself by my flaws. Flaws aren't who we are; they are what gets in the way of who we are. The more we overcome those flaws, the more we become the person we truly are supposed to be -- the person God created us to be.
For example, even though I was addicted to pornography, I did not define myself as a porn addict. I had a bad way of responding to stress and needed to find better ways.
I also find that I do better responding to opportunities to do good than simply avoiding the bad. For example, instead of simply not being impatient, I try to think about being patient and understanding. This opens doors -- once I am open to being understanding, I can ask questions to help me better understand. Sometimes I find out the person has a problem that I can help with.
Instead of simply not being lustful, I focus on seeing people as whole people. This, in turn, opens up the possibility of connecting. Instead of thinking about not being envious, I try to think about being grateful and counting my blessings. Then, not only am I less envious, but I am reminded of the things I have to feel good about.
Anyway, I just thought I'd share what helps me. I don't like to see people limiting themselves with labels.
I am going to take the message that I should read more Dyer, Frankl, Maslow, and Neitzche.
I am too closed minded on suggestion, and I will work on trying not to label myself.
I do believe I have a very closed mind, and I find having a closed mind allows just a bit more security, but it also eliminates new opportunities and better points of view.
Today I am going to work on being more considerate of what others have to offer and say.
Have a great day.
"I you desire to reach your highest potential and fufill your purpose for which you incarnated, you will need to live a life of sobriety"
Nisargadatta Maharaj
I've definitely got a full plate, but some of the things I am being served I want to pick up off the plate and throw against the wall.
I do agree any life worth living with purpose needs to include sobriety.
I've got an occupied day today, so the potential of porn watching being a problem is minimal. I am very happy to see InnerQuest and Wolf discussing.
Have a great day.
I remember when I first started my recovery, it was a second at a time, then a minute at a time, then an hour at a time, then a week, you get the gist.
I heard someone say that God only gives us grace for the moment not for entire journey so that from moment to moment we can grow into who we are meant to be.
My images were those of holding my cat, a sunset I remembered I loved, some funny scene from a favorite sitcom, etc eventually those pesky images faded and my mind eventually went to what I had taught it to see, only the good stuff, nothing lascivious or provocative.
Wolf ( 5 years sober)
Yes I do feel very important today, that could be a problem. Yes my ego is awake and alive, that could be a problem.
Overwhelmed, watch out for anything that makes us overwhelmed.
Do the right thing and God will save the day.
Have a great day.
Stress if tolerated and not done anything about will be given the power to influence unwanted acting out..
Have a great day.
Doing well, I realize I am compulsive sexually and am never really ever protected from it with my own resources.
If I tolerate frustration and resentment, acting out will look like a viable solution. This is denial, and it is important for me to do the right thing today even if I want to do wrong.
Have a great day.
Inner would it be too open of a request for you to share those defects? If you are willing to share the defects can you state the aspects too? If you do not wish to that I understandable.
Great news my friend, I know how liberating it can be for a person to see who they really have become and in some instances still are.
You're doing great man, this recovery thing is priceless at times and like all great things the work done to achieve the greatness is never seen as vanity when looked at in hindsight. The work is always worth the product when it makes a person's life better.
Have a great day.
InnerQuest, I am glad you are doing so great, but you didn't address my question.
Can you or can't you share your character defects and character assets with us?
You're doing great by the way.
Have a great day.