Schizophrenia Support Group
Schizophrenia is a psychiatric diagnosis that describes a mental disorder characterized by impairments in the perception of reality and by significant social dysfunction. Untreated schizophrenia is typically characterized by demonstrating disorganized thinking and experiencing delusions or auditory hallucinations.
I attempted to contact the doctor in hopes of an appointment and I have to wait another month. Meanwhile they have wrongfully billed me. :(
But I haven't been okay lately. I can't sleep, I can't eat, I can't get aroused and all I do is cry. I haven't had sleep in a little over 24hours and my family is driving me over the edge. I constantly have headaches and cramp up. I'm exhausted , i wanna scream and yell and runaway but I can't. Today all I have thought about is dying and the people around me as well as my voices agree with me strongly. I can see it when they follow me and laugh at me I know theyre laughing at me because theyre looking at me. People always follow me. I've been having vivid visions of people following me in the street but when I turn back around they have disappeared into thin air. Dogs chase me but I can't see them I can hear them their chains jiggle and the breath patterns. I feel attacked and scared and alone and helpless and hopeless I'm scared and I want help but I don't want people to take me back to where I was before ; I had no privacy or anything and they thought I was weak. I can't help but think about all of my failures and the things I've done wrong instead of right. I feel like something is awakening inside of me. I find myself watching people watch me and thinking about killing people sometimes. I feel darkness is taking over me but I don't know why or how. I'm scared to live but death will solve nothing. I NEED HELP but I have no transportation and I live in a small country town that doesnt have a psych unit in the emergency room. So the question that lingers is do I let my darkness engulf me ?
But I haven't been okay lately. I can't sleep, I can't eat, I can't get aroused and all I do is cry. I haven't had sleep in a little over 24hours and my family is driving me over the edge. I constantly have headaches and cramp up. I'm exhausted , i wanna scream and yell and runaway but I can't. Today all I have thought about is dying and the people around me as well as my voices agree with me strongly. I can see it when they follow me and laugh at me I know theyre laughing at me because theyre looking at me. People always follow me. I've been having vivid visions of people following me in the street but when I turn back around they have disappeared into thin air. Dogs chase me but I can't see them I can hear them their chains jiggle and the breath patterns. I feel attacked and scared and alone and helpless and hopeless I'm scared and I want help but I don't want people to take me back to where I was before ; I had no privacy or anything and they thought I was weak. I can't help but think about all of my failures and the things I've done wrong instead of right. I feel like something is awakening inside of me. I find myself watching people watch me and thinking about killing people sometimes. I feel darkness is taking over me but I don't know why or how. I'm scared to live but death will solve nothing. I NEED HELP but I have no transportation and I live in a small country town that doesnt have a psych unit in the emergency room. So the question that lingers is do I let my darkness engulf me ?
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My day...today...misplaced my debit card...didn't realize it until I got to the register after shopping to a full cart. Used a different debit card and pulled apart everything looking for missing debit card before I left parking lot. Got home, dropped keys. So now I have a missing debit card, missing keys. A full cartload to unload and put away. I got everything put away.Dumped purse for a...
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I don't really know how to label this but I having a rough week and I can't say it's one thing.... I have a lot on my plate which is nothing new and I try to cope in many positive ways and do but I still have my moments.My kids more so my daughters talk to me about everything which I know it's cause of comfort and we are close.... however I really struggle with the venting about their dad which...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f_3jsyDW76E
my mind is racing to fast for me to focus with television i have like two voices in my head besides me and my thought process isnt all the way there. The only time I can watch TV is when its time for bed which I never know when that is.
They have a mobile crisis center I will call not sure how fast response will be with this hurricane blowing through
there is the emerg. room if worse comes to worse, just please don't give in to the darkness.
I thank you all for your help and responses and I am hoping to find my way to where i need to be. Bless you all
Just a thought... A potentially bright focus for the madness...
Regardless, please don't let your star fade from my night sky.