Rape Support Group

If you or someone you know has been the victim of rape, this is the place to find support and get advice. If you want, discuss your experience, share your feelings, and meet others going through a similar situation.

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acinorev92 09/09/2014

I feel like I'm just going through life in a sort of haze... I feel like a zombie. I look horrible, I feel horrible, I want to cry all the time... Less than a week ago I met up with a guy who works at a bar I go to regularly, I wanted to be friends and see what could potentially happen in the future (seemed like a really great guy)...well....didn't go the way I had anticipated. He kept trying to touch me, and wouldn't stop when I told him to, I said "no" and "stop" multiple times... He just kept going... He said we wouldn't have sex then before I know it he's inside me - without a condom. I shut down. I gave up fighting. I took kickboxing so that if I were ever in a bad situation I could get out of it...but....I shut down and I couldn't fight. I'm trying to just focus on school and spend time with my friends, but it's really difficult to act as if nothing happened. He works at my favourite bar....It's where we met.... and now I'm afraid to go back. I know he can't leave his post to try to confront me but I'm afraid seeing him will be traumatizing, but at the same time, I don't want to avoid my favourite place where I have real friends that work there and go there... Not sure what to do anymore... I really regret giving him my number... I just wish I could take it all back. I just want to be okay again.

DayDreaminDreamer 09/09/2014

Sweetheart, it's only been 6 days... an impact of rape, well, it doesnt go away itself. It's something that in order for you to recover from, you'll have to face it head on. Have you considered seeing a therapists helps in helping you deal with the trauma?

When you say you shut off, it sounds you froze, which is a normal instinctive reaction under the circumstances. Lots of rape victims freeze during the rape, and it's normal.

Seeing your rapist might be further traumatising if you force yourself to be OK with being near him. It's great you want not let it defeat you, but I don't think it's a good idea to be near him until you have sufficiently dealt with the trauma.

DayDreaminDreamer 09/09/2014

BTW, did you get yourself checked out for STDs, just in case? If not, I would recommend you do it.

valgal18 09/09/2014

i'm so sorry that that happened to you....i agree with DayDreaming.....i think it would be a good idea to try and see a therapist......it takes time to heal from something as traumatizing as this.....like DayDreaming said, freezing is a normal reaction....i froze for part of my first rape and most of my second rape.....it happens a lot....trying to forget it causes emotional and mental damage.....i really hope that you decide to seek therapy or some form of counseling......again, i agree with DayDreaming: it's great that you want to go back to the bar and it sounds like it's a fun place, but i don't think it would be healthy unless you start the healing journey....i hope this helped....if you ever wanna talk, please feel free to message me

acinorev92 09/10/2014

Thank you both, I'm getting tested for STDs as soon as I can, and I'm going to see a counselor soon too, but I know I'm not ready to talk about it so openly yet..

deleted_user 09/11/2014

Sweety no matter how much time passes it will be with you, it sucks to say but its the truth. I really hope you went to the police and got checked! I know that feels like being raped all over again but it will help in the long run and maybe stop the bastard from doing it to someone else!! I truly am so sorry that it happened to you no one deserves this

TaliaFerrera12 09/12/2014

It is still to recent for you. The pain is still stuck to you and raw. I wish you luck. I was to scared to even go back to school after my incident. I moved back to Georgia with my family and shut down completely. I am so sorry that happened to you and wish you luck. I hope you can face this better than I did.

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