Pulmonary Embolism Support Group
By far the most common form of pulmonary embolism is a thromboembolism, which occurs when a blood clot, generally a venous thrombus, becomes dislodged from its site of formation and embolizes to the arterial blood supply of one of the lungs. Symptoms may include difficulty breathing, pain during breathing, and more rarely circulatory instability and death.
My daughter 16 in high school has had major emotional issues since my PE. She is afraid I am going to die and as a single mother with a very absent ex/father she feels like she will be left in the world with no one. I have had 'Sam' hospitalized at its worst as she became harmful to herself and the docs medicated her but a therapist appointment is still 8 weeks from her time in the hospital.
She was present when the ambulance came and was in the ER and refused to leave me even for a minute in ICU, the 'clot buster' treatment and the days of blood draws and tests.
Are any of you dealing with family members that are lost with your illness and unable to cope AND what has been helpful for your family?
She was present when the ambulance came and was in the ER and refused to leave me even for a minute in ICU, the 'clot buster' treatment and the days of blood draws and tests.
Are any of you dealing with family members that are lost with your illness and unable to cope AND what has been helpful for your family?
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Look at what my best friend did with my picture!
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We all have 24 hours in a day. How we spend these hours is important. Watching a little bit of a video about how sitting affects us made me aware of how much sitting and laying down I do. Gonna have to work on that.Your turn. Tell me another truth.
In the meantime, I would suggest talking to her doctor about adjustments to her meds (if the current ones don't seem to be helping) and maybe getting her started with journaling (if she's a writer) or some other artistic outlet, if she got some other things that she likes. Also, maybe she could join a support group online for anxiety and fear that would give her a chance to talk to others.
And, also, a little bit of activity. If you're able to do some minor exercise, maybe go out and take a walk around the block together. You'll get some time to bond and the exercise will release endorphins that can help with depression.
All of my suggestions really seem kind of simple when I look at them, but I hope something will help or that these ideas will give you a springboard to something else. I can only imagine how hard this has been for both of you right now and I'm glad you're there for each other.
My husband had a difficult time for a while after my PE. He called the ambulance and watched the paramedics work on me in our living room, and was with me in the ER and was with me daily in the hospital, and yeah, it really took a toll on him. So once I got home he was very over protective and didn't like when I was out by myself. It caused a lot of tension between us for a while. He kind of saw himself as my life saver, that had he not been home to call the ambulance, I'd have died, so I think that thinking translated to our daily lives. It was a very difficult time for us, me fighting for my independence and wanting to badly to get back to my normal life, and him so frightened I'd drop dead anywhere at any moment that he started treating me like a child. Eventually with time and just through us talking about not only my experience but his experience, which is equally as important and equally as emotional, he was able back off a bit and relax.
But I think it's probably more frightening for a kid to see their parent that way, especially if she's already vulnerable and sensitive to things for other reasons, like an absent father, that may just intensify things. I totally agree with Toss that 8 weeks seems so far off for such a serious and dangerous response from your daughter. Hurting herself is an extreme act regardless of the reasons.
Outside of that, I think really talking about it with each other really helps as it takes away the power of the fear and the memory in a lot of ways. That and really hearing her.
I'm sorry you guys are going through this.
Because she'd been through therapy for a major depression after her dad's passing, she had the tools to work it through. Still, this was very hard for her, especially since I was going through major anxiety over the PE myself.
I agree that therapy is the best way to deal with this. Some schools have psychologists on staff and that may be an option for you.
One way to help her is to listen to her and to not dismiss her feelings. I found that talking about my own fears and talking it through helped a lot.
It's now been seven months for me, and, I must admit, she is doing a lot better than I am. For one thing, I do not burden her with my own fears of having permanent heart damage or of having another PE.
good luck to both of you.
http://lwelch.hubpages.com/hub/Recovering-From-A-Pulmonary-Embolism
The point being that there would not be so many of us on these forums if we kicked from another PE. In all the online studies and readings that I can find, I have not found a documented case of PE death while therapeutic on Warfarin. It doesn't mean it doesn't happen but I have not found any record. My father had his first PE at 50, he is now 84.
Your daughter needs to "somehow" understand that bad things happen but once they are in the rear-view mirror, drop 'em. I, along with many on this and other boards, came very, very close to dying. But I didn't and neither did you. Tomorrow one of us may die in a car accident (much more likely than dying from PE). Worry about the stuff that you can control or influence.
Perhaps exposure to a medical enviroment as a volunteer (are there still "candy stripers" in hospitals?) would show her that people get sick and recover all the time; clearly some never leave vertically but I don't think CSs work with them. Or perhaps a retirement facility. Old people usually have a calm perspective on things. My parents and grand-relatives lived through wars, not remotely in the USA but actually in theater with bullets and bombs. After that, nothing much rattles them. Hearing those stories from people who were there might give her a different take on life.