Prescription and Synthetic Drug Abuse Support Group

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Thoughts about overdosing...

dsf95
dsf95
I had a breakdown from 2006-2009... I overdosed on prescription psychiatric drugs 2x in 2007. I had one plan to commit suicide that I didn't try, which was to go to the river and take sleeping pills and jump in. I don't want to do that now, but sometimes I want the total oblivion of the drugged sleep of overdosing...

I built up a tolerance to sleeping pills when I was a teenager. I felt I had no place to go, so I would take lots of sominex and excedrin pm to sleep through the painful hours , about 10 pills eventually. I miss it sometimes, but I never do that anymore. It killed my stomach and I was able to stop in 97.

How do I stop feeling tempted?
deleted_user
deleted_user
I'm curious what you mean by "the total oblivion of the drugged sleep of overdosing." Are you not able to sleep normally? Or are you in emotional pain that you wish would end? I hear that you're not actively suicidal. Please tell me if I'm wrong, but it sounds like you want to escape some really painful feelings. I'm sorry that you're feeling so overwhelmed. What do you do to cope? What helps you get through when things are really tough? If sleep is a problem, have you tried talking to a doctor about alternatives, whether they are prescriptions such as clonodine or OTC remedies such as melatonin? I know that once you get hooked on the stronger stuff you convince yourself that nothing else can work, but you might be surprised. Your brain responds very differently to different types of chemical compounds. They don't all work through the same mechanisms.
dsf95
dsf95
You're right, it's about emotional pain. I sleep pretty well, except I wake up @ 5 in the morning because my leg swells due to vascular issues and lymphedema. That's physical. I haven't taken sleeping pills in a while, maybe I take 2 excedrin pm every three months. I guess some of the emotional pain is fighting lymphedema... It's hard not to think "you've been biking every day and watching what you eat for 3 years just to be a size 14. Yippie doo" it's hard to have this condition. Thanks for the reply.
Community Leaderbobinmaine
bobinmaine
it sounds like you want to self medicate some deep emotional pain you are feeling.

You just need alot of support! Is their a weight watchers group in your area which has meetings you can attend? I know you get some here but face to face meetings can be better.

Looks like you have come a long way with your weight program and from other setbacks you have had in your life and you deserve alot of credit, not an easy thing for anyone to do! Keep up the good work, you are doing great!

God Bless!
dsf95
dsf95
thanks @ bobinmaine... I'm on Herbalife right now and can talk to Herbalife friends.... :)
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