One of the major underlying reasons contributing to addiction is depression. At times it seems much too difficult to face our emotional pains and axieties, especially if they are overwelming such as the death of a loved one or a major change in one's life like a job loss.

When my mother past away from alcoholic liver sirosis many years ago, I had just lost my job due to a permanent layoff. A short time later I had lost my girlfriend whom I had been seeing for 2 years. She dumped me for another guy.

So three major life changing experiences in a short amount of time made me suicidal. I mentioned this to my exgirlfriend on a day when we were talking as friends and she told me that the key to having a healthy mind is in having a healthy body.

That didn't sink in for awhile
until one evening I decided to see how far my flat feet would take me and it was approximately the distance between 2 telephone poles! That wasn't exceptable to me so I went every single evening and each time, I tried to go just a little bit further.

About a year later, I found myself running 4 miles a day. I continued to increase my distance realizing how good it felt to run. I learned that the brain secretes morphine like substances called endorphins which are the body's natural pain killers. That would explain my " High " feeling toward the end of a run.

My metabolism was much faster and I couldn't gain weight no matter how much I ate. In fact, I trimmed up and lost weight. I healed very rapidly! If I cut myself one day it would be almost all healed the next!
My veins and arteries had all enlarged along with my heart and my heart rate was lower then normal. In fact, the more fit I became, the lower my heart rate. At one point I measured it at 28 beats per minute resting and with a rate so low, the brain generates longer alpha waves and this is better then any high any pill ever gave me!

In 1996 after running for nearly 20 years, I ran in the Boston Marathon and finished. This was actually my third try at a marathon and I prayed for and had alot of signs along the way that I would make it and I did although it was far from easy. I hit the wall at 15 miles and from that point on it was pure will power. For those who dont know what "hit the wall" means, at 15 miles every runner no matter how well conditioned he is, runs out of glycogen because the body can only store about 200 grams. From that point on the body digest it's own muscle fiber for energy and this comes at a time when u need your muscles the most!
The feeling is just what the term says. It feels like hitting the wall.
Crossing the finish line on that memorable day was like no other and one I'll always remember.

It took me about 3 months to recover from that 26 mile run but I seemed to sink into another depression, maybe from the lack of excercise. From the 3 months of inactivity, arthritus set into my spine. The constant pain affected my job and and I kept looking for better pain pills to get me through the day. Eventually the only thing left was narcotics and that is how my addiction started. My habit lasted about 3 years. I quit and turned to alcohol for a short period of time. I have been sober for over a year and a half but still battling depression.

I recently started running again. Many things have changed. I am 50 pounds over my running weight. I also have to start at the beginning again and go just one step at a time. I started walking 2 miles. After a fer weeks I was alternating walking and running. Hoping in a few more weeks to be able to run the 2 mile distance nonstop and increase my distance from there,

I have thoughts in the distant future of one day doing another marathon before I die. I will dedicate to all you guys here that help me along the way.

God Bless and TC!