Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Support Group
Find support with others who have gone through a traumatic experience. Whether you have chronic or acute PTSD, we are here for you.
I'm visually impaired, but ... in the same way that some deaf people can actually speak ... I can still type at least a hundred words a minute.
You've been warned ;-)
That's our dog, Sammy, in my pic.
Technically, it's my wife's dog. After I was arrested, and had to leave my house in June 2012, she bought him to fill the void in her life. But I've been staying with her since my last Mayo Clinic trip, so ... I get to share my life with him, too, right now :-)
Sammy's the kindest, gentlest, best-tempered, sweetest rescue yellow lab you'll ever meet. He's my constant companion.
Medically, I'm reduced to walking him most days, and watching/listening to TV. And Sam's a part of it all.
Periodically, if I'm too beaten up to walk, but -- miraculously -- okay enough to drive a handful of miles, I'll take him to the dog park for fetch.
Sammy LOVES fetch :-)
And nearly every time ... Sammy -- infinitely more interested in the ball than in other people or other dogs -- will get molested, nagged, or -- literally -- attacked (no blood drawn yet. I'm ... hyper-vigilant !) by other dogs.
Whose idiotic owners, of course, have their backs to the situation, and are glad to be temporarily relieved (in their minds) of the responsibility of pet ownership.
By definition ... Sammy has NEVER done ANYTHING to engage, molest, torment, or provoke these dogs. He's got his own gig: fetch. I throw the ball away from the other dogs, and he runs away from them to fetch it.
But no provocation is needed. They nip at him, try to tackle him, bite at his ears ....
[I don't mean the playful stuff. Of course that's okay. But you quickly get a sense of which dog ... isn't playing.]
At worst, Sammy will growl ... a very clear "back off, Buddy" growl. But I don't think he's capable of mounting a defense, even if things get too far before I intervene.
He's just ... not wired that way.
The more my story* makes its way around the internet, the more that insanely vocal 10 - 15% of readers ... lays into me. Textbook victim blaming.
They offer a laundry list of every single thing I "did wrong --" very much like the Homeowners Association Board of Directors VP did -- without ever saying ....
"Why didn't they just stop the dogs from barking ?"
Then they launch into all manner of personal attacks, calling me every name in the book -- ALSO like the HOA Board VP did.
But -- like Sammy at the dog park -- I never did anything to anybody. Never.
At age 51, I never HAVE, either.
I'm one of those good to my family, good to my friends, always early on moving day to help load/unload the truck, help little old ladies cross the street guys. A "white hat," in short.
Victim blaming.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/in-love-and-war/201311/why-do-we-blame-victims
I hate it.
I hate the percentage of our society that seems to elevate it to a national pastime. I hate how it re-victimizes people who truly are victims, and truly were harmed.
I hate how it pretty much gives the true criminals/thugs/sociopaths ... a hall pass. Classic deflection. "Pay no attention to the rapist behind the curtain" stuff.
I'm sure it's happened to quite a few of us. I'm asking you to share those bits if you're comfortable, or ... your thoughts on the subject if you aren't.
I haven't had a dog owner YET blame Sam for THEIR dog attacking HIM, but ... I expect it will eventually happen. Not entirely sure how I'll react if/when it does.
As always, I wish us all peace, health, and strength.
--
* http://myemail.constantcontact.com/It-s-NFH-Season-.html?soid=1103447981936&aid=zT2W2ZwKCbM
You've been warned ;-)
That's our dog, Sammy, in my pic.
Technically, it's my wife's dog. After I was arrested, and had to leave my house in June 2012, she bought him to fill the void in her life. But I've been staying with her since my last Mayo Clinic trip, so ... I get to share my life with him, too, right now :-)
Sammy's the kindest, gentlest, best-tempered, sweetest rescue yellow lab you'll ever meet. He's my constant companion.
Medically, I'm reduced to walking him most days, and watching/listening to TV. And Sam's a part of it all.
Periodically, if I'm too beaten up to walk, but -- miraculously -- okay enough to drive a handful of miles, I'll take him to the dog park for fetch.
Sammy LOVES fetch :-)
And nearly every time ... Sammy -- infinitely more interested in the ball than in other people or other dogs -- will get molested, nagged, or -- literally -- attacked (no blood drawn yet. I'm ... hyper-vigilant !) by other dogs.
Whose idiotic owners, of course, have their backs to the situation, and are glad to be temporarily relieved (in their minds) of the responsibility of pet ownership.
By definition ... Sammy has NEVER done ANYTHING to engage, molest, torment, or provoke these dogs. He's got his own gig: fetch. I throw the ball away from the other dogs, and he runs away from them to fetch it.
But no provocation is needed. They nip at him, try to tackle him, bite at his ears ....
[I don't mean the playful stuff. Of course that's okay. But you quickly get a sense of which dog ... isn't playing.]
At worst, Sammy will growl ... a very clear "back off, Buddy" growl. But I don't think he's capable of mounting a defense, even if things get too far before I intervene.
He's just ... not wired that way.
The more my story* makes its way around the internet, the more that insanely vocal 10 - 15% of readers ... lays into me. Textbook victim blaming.
They offer a laundry list of every single thing I "did wrong --" very much like the Homeowners Association Board of Directors VP did -- without ever saying ....
"Why didn't they just stop the dogs from barking ?"
Then they launch into all manner of personal attacks, calling me every name in the book -- ALSO like the HOA Board VP did.
But -- like Sammy at the dog park -- I never did anything to anybody. Never.
At age 51, I never HAVE, either.
I'm one of those good to my family, good to my friends, always early on moving day to help load/unload the truck, help little old ladies cross the street guys. A "white hat," in short.
Victim blaming.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/in-love-and-war/201311/why-do-we-blame-victims
I hate it.
I hate the percentage of our society that seems to elevate it to a national pastime. I hate how it re-victimizes people who truly are victims, and truly were harmed.
I hate how it pretty much gives the true criminals/thugs/sociopaths ... a hall pass. Classic deflection. "Pay no attention to the rapist behind the curtain" stuff.
I'm sure it's happened to quite a few of us. I'm asking you to share those bits if you're comfortable, or ... your thoughts on the subject if you aren't.
I haven't had a dog owner YET blame Sam for THEIR dog attacking HIM, but ... I expect it will eventually happen. Not entirely sure how I'll react if/when it does.
As always, I wish us all peace, health, and strength.
--
* http://myemail.constantcontact.com/It-s-NFH-Season-.html?soid=1103447981936&aid=zT2W2ZwKCbM
I have to admit ... when we moved to Colorado in 2008, I was pretty optimistic. The chemically burned eyes were a pretty devastating medical blow. I hadn't figured out how to have a fulfilling life, but ... I had momentum.
What took place in that neighborhood ... in this city ... not only stripped me of all the things I so often list (ie, house, marriage, health, lenses, life's savings), but -- most importantly -- that momentum.
My life as a disabled person was a tightrope act, between two tall buildings. Just. Don't. Fall.
I didn't fall. People threw rocks at me until they knocked me down.
Now ... five years later ... I'm still on that city street below ... broken ... looking up ... and wondering how I'll ever get off the pavement again.
And the longer I lay like that ... the dimmer the proverbial flame gets.
My heart's getting worse. No safe way to treat it. With the heart issues comes steadily-increasing fatigue.
And as we all know ... fatigue makes absolutely everything worse.
No bueno.
Definitely ... no bueno.