Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Support Group
Find support with others who have gone through a traumatic experience. Whether you have chronic or acute PTSD, we are here for you.

arfie
Feelings are neither right nor wrong but they are important by virtue of being mine. ~Courage to Change.
The spill of the Exxon Valdez (1989) coincided with the start of the separation which carried my beloved and I the nearest we have ever come to divorce. My in-laws were significant players in that separation. Only significant. Nowhere near the only element in a complex equation which included my own psychotic breaks from what is now being called, "cPTSD." I pretty much did divorce the in-laws. I had already held a "Therapy Funeral" for my own parents, so full detachment from them felt both natural and the easiest part of the struggle to save what I could of my own family. They were devoted, recently retired Exxon employees, so grasping that current event to summarize them as the Captains of the Valdez was even easier. It encapsulated them into a single element which could be set aside in my desperate need to simplify an overly complex equation.
The divorce did not happen and my beloved and I have progressed much, both individually and together, since 1989. Progress within his own family relations is quite impressive in my beloved's personal progress. I have not really been a part of that progress. I go to "The Valdez" when my husband believes I can be helpful and keep interactions with the Captains and their crew to a minimum. Not my business.... Don't especially want it to be my business...
Still...
Are my current anger rounds the first holes in that wall of repressed emotions?
Still sorting...
The spill of the Exxon Valdez (1989) coincided with the start of the separation which carried my beloved and I the nearest we have ever come to divorce. My in-laws were significant players in that separation. Only significant. Nowhere near the only element in a complex equation which included my own psychotic breaks from what is now being called, "cPTSD." I pretty much did divorce the in-laws. I had already held a "Therapy Funeral" for my own parents, so full detachment from them felt both natural and the easiest part of the struggle to save what I could of my own family. They were devoted, recently retired Exxon employees, so grasping that current event to summarize them as the Captains of the Valdez was even easier. It encapsulated them into a single element which could be set aside in my desperate need to simplify an overly complex equation.
The divorce did not happen and my beloved and I have progressed much, both individually and together, since 1989. Progress within his own family relations is quite impressive in my beloved's personal progress. I have not really been a part of that progress. I go to "The Valdez" when my husband believes I can be helpful and keep interactions with the Captains and their crew to a minimum. Not my business.... Don't especially want it to be my business...
Still...
Are my current anger rounds the first holes in that wall of repressed emotions?
Still sorting...
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Vigorous workouts are my most usual remedy for anger. They haven't been working well so far in this round. Today they seem to be working!!! I have been doing grunt labor in between the psychobabbling here. Sure am getting allot done!!! All "girl stuff," but that's okay. The "girl stuff" still needs doing and is honorable, physically intensive labor.
Second? THERE IS NO GIRL STUFF OR GUY STUFF, JUST STUFF THAT HAS TO BE DONE! Sorry to shout, but I hate that distinguishing between girls and guys and what they do. Bah phooey. If I gotta fxi the car, hey, I gotta. If Hubby gotta cook, hey, he gotta cook. So that's my POV on that stuff, but note I am a different generation.
As for anger and holes and walls?
Yeah. My anger over (XYZ) usually leads back to pain from (ABC) and ends in PTSD BS and me feeling SOL because a big old Charlie-Foxtrot is about to be known.
Cheers and babble on, who knows what will work....
Blessings on you and your beloved both.
As always, I apologize for my political incorrectness. Still don't wanna be a feminist poster girl spouting dictated vernacular. Back to my closet!!!
In the privacy of our own family, hubby and I have lots of poetic fun when he cooks dinner and scrubs toilets while I mow the lawn. Maybe some day the world will be ready to hear it...
I personally think that ay woman trying to have it all---family, career, marriage, social life---is going to collapse under the weight of all that.
As my own mama said, "I can be a good mom and nurse or a good housekeeper and a good nurse. I know which one's important." So she went with mom-Nurse as her primary "identity" and others were all bitchy (Dad included) that the house was imperfect, etc.---well, we had a house b/c she worked. If he'd ever picked upa rqge, we'd hae had a *clean* house.
I shy from the extreme views on either end---I must either e a walking incubator kowtowing to anything with a penis, or I must hate all things unless they are "empowering" to all "womanhood"...
I dislike being told who to be, can you tell, LOL!.
Mom also won't be told who she is.
"Hush, you unruly Engineering Puppet Show cast!!! All sides, Just shut the fuck up!!! I just want to get the work done!!! I don't freaking care what you call it!!!"
Sigh. I still can't even say it right. How am I ever going to get past it? Is it really worth it to even try any more?
How did this thread turn into a feminist debate, anyway???
Oh yea... I used a politically incorrect name for my anger management workout. Sigh.