Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Support Group
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Recently, I've had a difficult time developing trust in my new relationship. There's no doubt that it's a product from previous experiences with men (abuse, sexual assault and cheating). I feel like I've lost my trust in men from the stresses in the past.. Now I can't help but form assumptions in my new relationship; that I might be fooled once again. I have episodes of panick that I can't control when I suspect moments of distrust in this new relationship, and although I try to keep it to myself, my ways of coping are... more harmful than helpful. Any advice or relatable experiences? I want to know if I'll ever be able to release this trauma from the past and start fresh.
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I did the dumbest thing today. I charged my earbuds, unplugged the block and put the block in my little bag instead of the earbuds. I wasn't happy about that when I got to the gym. What a dummy!
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Ever since I stopped doing therapy because of insurance, I've been feeling that old tense and irritable sense of anxiety and stress. I hate that. I was making so many strides and changes during therapy, my therapist would acknowledge all of my progress and accomplishments, and I miss that reassurance. Today I thought about it, and I made those changes! She would always tell me that I chose to...
it really isn't as much about other people as it is about myself. trusting myself matters the most - that's where the fear came into play anyway.
for me, the best way to help myself is learning to trust myself. doing things with me, having a date with me : ) building me. the rest will follow. without me, the rest is going to be a disaster.
I still haven't found a way to a single, justy letting go. I don't believe there is a way to start over with a clean, fresh canvas of Life. My own recovery has looked more like taking the broken pieces and making them beautiful. Whichever way I just ^it^, I still have to wake up each morning the same person I was yesterday. The changes have come in bits and pieces.
Trust remains a toughie for me, as well. Like Lilly, I find it more productive to work on self-trust before I worry about trusting other people. I also find it easier to work on it in bits and pieces. I am not sure I ever will accomplish one big, monolithic Trust. Trusting myself to stay calm during a specific meeting or task is much easier than declaring myself or anyone else Trustworthy In All Things, Past, Present and Future. That tactic has given me unrealistic expectations every time.
You are not alone, AP. Trust is a toughie. Hope you feel safe to work on it here. Welcome to the forum. Gentle support while you find what works for your own, unique case.
Grateful for your responses!