Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Support Group
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Feeling ill equipped and unprepared for this season. On top of everything, my moms health is as bad as we thought. Maybe worse. She’s had a heart attack, refused to be admitted and has a stress test later this week. Sometimes I think she wants to die. It would make sense. She’s never dealt with life or stood up for herself and she’s caused a lot of hurt. I’m half her age and swore I’d kill myself by fifty if I couldn’t figure life out. I don’t know how to handle any of this. Going into work sleepless, sad, stressed, and so confused. I’m so tired of being confused....
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I did the dumbest thing today. I charged my earbuds, unplugged the block and put the block in my little bag instead of the earbuds. I wasn't happy about that when I got to the gym. What a dummy!
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Ever since I stopped doing therapy because of insurance, I've been feeling that old tense and irritable sense of anxiety and stress. I hate that. I was making so many strides and changes during therapy, my therapist would acknowledge all of my progress and accomplishments, and I miss that reassurance. Today I thought about it, and I made those changes! She would always tell me that I chose to...
Rocking you gently and crying with you, Marah.
The continual confusion do get wearisome.
P.S. I prefer to be called, "Grinch." His toys are wa-a-a-ay cooler.
So I went to DC to Ford's Theater (where Pres. Lincoln was shot) to see a stage production of Dickens' A Christmas Carol, and I viewed it a little different. I totally identify with Scrooge. I'm an old male an everything. Bah humbug is my mantra.
I had a good time. I have a big heart after all, like him. But every Christmas I have to work through all of the sentimental, sappy Christmas specials on TV and all of the sappy hypocritical commercials to get to the true spirit of Christmas. That Dickens piece, A Christmas Carol, does the trick for me.
It's still popular, Must do it for many folks. eh?