Rocking you gently and crying with you, Marah.

May your courage pay off in healing hopes.

I know. My parents pastored a church of 3,000 abroad. Nobody believed me about what was going on behind the scenes to the point that I doubted myself, I normalized things, too.

Then they got caught committing fraud. The church board there, their missions board in the USA, and the government of the country they lived in all fired them and deported them very publicly.

Suddenly, all I'd been saying and doubting was validated as true about these "role model leaders." My lesson from that? Believe yourself and believe in yourself. Lots of support to you today for that, Marah.

Soft purring puma comfort, Marah. My therapist(s) blinked a few times at what I called "just everyday" and then it really made me realize... But Muji is right. Believe your truths, and believe that healing happens, okay?

BTW, Yeah, some things aren't done --- but we had them done to or around us, and there it is. You're not alone. We're here.

Hello Marah, I can understand the feeling after what a family member did to me. It was so hard to look people in the eye because I felt ashamed. It was real. My counselor helped me to walk through some of it. One of the things that helped me was listening to a radio broadcast, the woman was talking about how when she was raped, it was a feeling of being dirty. She likened it to someone throwing up on you.. I hope that you continue to speak with a therapist and get the help and healing that you need.

Thanks for sharing bits of your stories and the encouraging words. It’s bern a hard week for a lot of reasons

I normalized my childhood abuse too. I normalized it so much I walked into a 35 year marriage of abuse I thought was normal. It took my psychologist explaining how abnormal my life was to me. It's been a nightmare. I've felt so stupid. Keep up with the therapist and work through it. It takes time. Gentle (((Hugs))).

I have also felt so so stupid. Thank you for saying that. We are not stupid but I understand what you’re saying. I have learned to have compassion on myself. My whole world was wrong. The violence covered the not so subtle abuse I thought was subtle after reading this book - until I said it out loud. It’s not subtle. If anyone else did it I’d feel wronged. Without a doubt. But my dad, brother and my husband, it just seemed normal. There’s nothing of that that’s my shame to carry. It’s theirs. It was their responsibility to teach me better as a child. They didn’t. It’s their fault it seemed normal. That doesn’t say anything about me or who I am. It says I didn’t have a fair chance. We can’t know anything without learning. This is just our time to learn. Blessings to you friend. Thanks for being here.