Dreams are tricky. Mine were symbolic of what my subconscious refused to let me know (for my own psychological survival). Otehrs are just stress release. Others are also just the subconscious kicking trash to the curb. It's hard to know. One dream can be all of the above for me!

Confirming a memory is tough. I have few to ask, and it's hard on them---especially if they're in Denial Land---but can you ask anyone in your family about the incident(s) in your nightmares? Just ask if anything like that ever happened. Yes or no question.

Do you journal these nightmares? It might help.

What's your therapist say? (Assuming you have one?)

In any case, I know how it is---wondering what the he** my brain is tossing at me.

Gentle purrs of support,
Leo

My dreams were also a mix of what LeoX3 says. As my healing progressed my dreams became more about me being able to fight the monsters in my dream instead of being afraid of them.

When I was a child I was terrified of the monsters under my bed and in my closet. I had a ritual every night before turning the light off - I would check the ceiling for spiders (terrified of spiders), look under the bed for monsters and then look in the closet for monsters. Then I would turn the light out and run into bed 'just in case' I missed one. Once in bed the covers came up quickly to hide me from anything that could hurt me. And although my family life was toxic the sexual abuse actually happened at a neighbors house so it didn't matter if it happened at home or away - I still felt there were monsters everywhere. Not sure if that is helpful or not.

I like to keep a dream journal because it's amazing to go back and read them a few days later because they made more sense after a bit of time.

It is scary healing from an abusive childhood but once you do you come out the other side feeling so much better. Your quality of life improves and you can live a wonderful full life without the memories haunting you every day.

(hugs)

I guess I can only add that whether these images are facts or not, in my experience they're not lies. They're true feelings to work through for a pay off of greater peace. So with that in mind, I've forged ahead when I've been at this same confusing point. And down the road, I did actually sort out fact from dream symbolism.

Just another thought to throw into the mix is that some psych meds can cause nightmares and some night terrors so if you're on any meds you might want to look up side effects... It can be so hard to tell just whats, what at times
Nightmares are horrible though no matter the cause... big hug...x

The reality of my emotions has been surfacing too and its very hard.....very, very hard you are not alone.

They come in dreams and when I am awake too.

Thanks all. Was along the lines of what I was expecting. Will continue to work with my counsellor and hope that emotions don't flare up too much. It's the first time in 18 months I feel as though I have the energy or desire to work through things. I know that if I walk away now I will never go back to counselling.

More memories are surfacing but I am also dealing with a very frail father and even though things are good now between us he was the cause of some of my trauma which I am shoving aside to deal with his needs right now.

You are an awesome bunch of people and I really value your insight and courage.