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I'm fear trapped in a box
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I haven't written in my diary on my computer since May because I thought that my computer was dying. I got away from writing but my computer is hanging in there. I think that I will start writing in it again. It's so therapeutic.
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First, I hope everyone is doing well, and continuing to fight that good fight! Keep up the great work on yourselves; I'm rooting for all of you!So, I started doing therapy at the beginning of the year, when I was in my most depressed state, but with my therapist, I made big changes and steps in the right direction. But, over a month ago, she couldn't take my insurance anymore, and I had to stop...
Trapped in a box
With hate and chaos
Sly like a fox
Yet rip off my lid
And it all explodes
Pandora weeps
Yet the box still holds hope.
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With something important to say
"The sky is falling
"The sky is falling
"We must all run, run away!!!"
I hear a jangling near the locks
Of my familiar box
I cower in the corner
A concentrated performer
Centered to spring in defense
Of my empty box and comforting locks
Of all I have ever known
Who-who-who am I?
I am fear, trapped in a box
Imprisoned in punishing stocks
And as the crows of fear peck my eyes
Who-who-who? the mourning dove cries.
Too much for a child
I am fear, trapped in a box
Bound in my memories with locks
One day the key I shall find
And no more will you rule my mind
trapped in a box
But don't be fooled
I'm about to blow your mind
Never underestimate my strength
Your locks have no hold on me
Cause one day I will be totally free.
The box is me and the fear is inside me
Fear of being alone
Fear of not being good enough
Fear I'll say the wrong thing
Fear because I don't trust
Fear of doing the wrong thing
Fear I will not get out of the box
I hold you here in my prison.
Anxiety are the walls that contain us.
The past has taught us, that is escaping is futile.
A bow of hopelessness is around us.
The air is leaving us.
A box of my own making
It keeps me safe, hidden from harm
Feeling isolated, alone, alarmed
How did I get here?
Oh yes, I know... the fear.