I have just discovered this forum.
I come from a very mentally abusive family.
I so very much want to tell my story to release its power over me.
I have always isolated, fear of being around people, feeling inadequate. I'm a grown adult and have no excuse to address this.
I am comforted in knowing I am not alone. A beautiful book I just discovered is called " You Can Heal Your Life" by Loise L. Hay. I want to heal. I want to STOP thinking my mother will ever change. She is so damaging to me, as are my two older siblings who are so mean and verbally destructive to my soul. I feel like I need someone to tell me to STOP communicating with them because it is dangerous to my mental health. So tired of feeling this way.

I wouldn't say I hate PTSD any less, but I am very grateful that an old friend who I thought didn't understand PTSD approached me precisely with a search to understand in mind. Understanding occurred, which is something I'm still celebrating after the weekend today, Tuesday.

It is so true, I have had PTSD since 2007, and until 2011 I didn't even know I had it. Sometimes I just didn't understand what was happening to me, I thought I was crazy until I saw a very good therapist. The only people who understand are people who have it themselves. And sometimes even we don't understand.

try having ptsd C ie DID and see how to clear a room if ignorant fearful people we need to come out of our closet,, we respect war vets going to the va from Iraq look at all the suicides,,,,, we have lost too many if your truth can save one life that is more meaningful than any validation I cant tell anyone what to do but it is ok to speak our truth but in so doing remember many have ptsd and a host of things going on and they are the ones who judge because they are looking good in the closet of mental health I know a doctor OMG fucked up and she will never be picked on or called out her boxes are so good,, ,, getting support and validation is very important,, I am willing to pay the price to talk to others because I have a reputation I built as a teacher but I suffered for that ,, by being silent about my own suffering there are so many who are just real good at hiding their afflictions

bmw,

I heard on the news today that every day there are 22 military suicides. I think PTSD has become a pandemic and pray society finally comes around.

22 a day.

Muji

Very true,people who don't have PTSD really don't understand! It's impossible to even try to explain to them what it's like since quite often they don't believe it can be such a problem! My gf has been able to deal with most of my other issues but still gets offended when I pull away from her when she comes at me quickly for a kiss or a hug! It's not something I consciously think of doing which is what she doesn't seem to understand!
Yes people can be very mean about it when they say things like "Just get over it!" I've had to deal with it for most of my life so I can't just do that as much as I would love to! The sad part is that it doesn't take much to be triggered like a loud noise or someone tapping you from behind when you're not expecting it! I've often thought about moving into the woods since I do live in Maine and it would be very easy to do so here!
It is very nice to have this support site since it's not a subject many people really talk about! I feel very bad for the soldier's who have to deal with this issue when they don't really many places to go to talk about it other than with other soldier's! I've known a Vietnam vet for about 20 years now and they really didn't get a chance to deal with it! Glad that you're sharing this with us! Hang in there!

I've banged my head against the wall we've discussed here for years, the wall of people not understanding. Tried to break through in marriage counseling, chats at church with my pastor, chats with friends, you name it. The result has been what we keep writing here as our common experience. "Get over it." "It's just in your head." "Well I didn't do it to you, don't blame me." "You've got to move on." "Stop whining." "I don't admire weakness in a man." And on and on.

So since "people don't understand" is well established, I find it hard even to imagine if they DID understand. Anybody have a picture of what that would look like? I ask most sincerely. I can't even envision it any more, and that bothers me.

Racism used to be the norm, and while it's not all gone, an African American is president. Sexism isn't gone, but we might elect a woman president in my lifetime. 15 years ago gay marriage was unthinkable, and not so much these days.

I'm not saying I'm for or against all of those changes. I'm just saying they're the result of big shifts in public perception. What would a big positive shift in the public perception of PTSD and those of us who have it look like? Is it imaginable? What is a reasonable vision for change for us in the future?

HMM a hero for PTSD? A renowned public figure that loses it in public, cannot control the reactions of even a hand extended to help. Because fear and anxiety rule at that moment. That goes on a venting, verbally and physically damaging on camera, a meltdown for the world to see. To see it happens to "idols", not hidden in a well paid places for "medical treatment" facility.

The sad truth is I feel they do exist, and are walking among us. Only the mask of anonymity, in front of the problem to hide behind.
I believe they are the sources of some of the most honored in their performance fields. Using experiences of life to draw on and create.

Wow. Speechless, in better words. I can identify myself with most of the responses written here. Not for praise, but mujica's words stick a lot with me. I've had similar experiences with family ,friends,and even church members that I used to know.

And you are right, Dracona. People really DON'T understand what its like to live in our shoes.They don't have to complain much at all or struggle as much as we do because we live with the open scars and wounds of our traumas. I believe that we don't really understand it as well as we think. I believe that much of our lives, we didn't have a choice as to have traumatic events in our lives. I also believe that we did not decide to live this life. What we do about it is a different choice, but point is: we live with it and we are the ones who suffer for the stigma and pain.

Long writing unexpected but, I totally get where you are coming from. This site has been my support for about a yr. It really does give meaning to its name.

i agree about nobody truly understands and the only person who does understand me is my long term bf. i told my therapist u can't truly understand someone unless you have gone through it yourself or at least try to put yourself in their shoes.

in school, i used to write a lot of papers about these issues. i told a person long ago all of us have flaws/issues that we all go through to say that it is a way to create drama or wanting attention is certainly cruel to say. this person got so mad called me every name in the book i asked do u have issues right now? that didn't go well at all lol.

my therapist is under the impression that my mother can be saved and i just looked at her thinking u poor thing! it's getting to the point now at age 27 that i have no real reason to talk about my issues because it always, always end up in a huge, bad argument with me looking like the bad guy and a liar! i am still singled out for things that weren't of my control yet blamed me cuz i decided to choose bad parents wtf?!?!? yep, that's what lots of people have told me.

Thanks, Kat. Again, "So since "people don't understand" is well established, I find it hard even to imagine if they DID understand. Anybody have a picture of what that would look like? I ask most sincerely. I can't even envision it any more, and that bothers me."

I don't repeat it just to make a point. It's a sincere question. I've been the misunderstood PTSD guy so many times it's hard for me to imagine otherwise. But people post on here about having spouses, and just having them not leave is big, in my opinion. And sometimes there's mention of when the spouse has made an empathetic comment. I had someone message me about it just a few minutes ago, them and their husband. Wow, what's is that like?