My life has been so outrageous that no one will believe.  They think I am a pathological liar.  Makes PTSD all the worse.

My mother was dangerously insane.  She tried to drown me, threatened to burn me alive and came at me with an axe before I was 6.

She kept me locked inside a ten foot high fence she had built to keep out demons she believed that she could see.

I had two chances to beg government functionaries for help but one laughed at me and the other brought me back to my mother.

I knew no one would help me so, at the age of five, I tried very hard and almost succeeded in murdering my own mother.

Finally, the government condescended to commit her to an asylum and I was thrown into a private Catholic boarding school where Franciscan nuns whipped children with doubled belts, locked us in closets and otherwise tortured us mentally and physically.

The nuns whipped me until I learned to follow Christ's teachings and my life began to straighten out nicely but then, when I was home on vacation at the age of 9, two men dragged me into an old house and did things to my body that were so vulgar that I puked all over myself and tried to commit suicide.  My school grades and my behavior plunged after that and I still have the report cards to prove it.

My father was cheated out of most of his income by some crooks so we had to move into a slum hotel surrounded by street gangs that terrorized me for years.  I became like a wild animal trying to defend itself against predators.  A teacher I asked for help told me to defend myself but, when I did, a coach punished me so cruelly for doing that that my pants had to be soaked off of my body because they had become glued to raw flesh with coagulated blood.

I began to hide from people on the flat roof of the hotel Dad and I lived in.  It was right across the alley from the police station so I found out how corrupt the cops were and asked myself why I should obey the law if the cops didn't have to obey the laws.  My 15 year old friend, Kipper, was knocked up by a cop who was simply allowed to resign from the police force and drive out of town to find another job while poor little Kipper was rushed to the hospital for surgery because the cop's leavings inside of her had caused an ectopic pregnancy that endangered her life.  Under influences like that, I became a pornographer, fence and loan shark from the age of 15 until I was 20.

The amoral things I did during those years hurt some people so badly that I have been blamed for several suicides.  I know about three for sure and have heard about two more.  And if you don't think I am a liar by now....try this.....I talked to one of those suicides after an emt crew pronounced her dead and then managed to resuscitate her on the way to the morgue.  I asked her if there were any bright lights after she died and she said....no, it was all darkness.

That is not what made me turn over a new leaf.  Because of the harm I did, a man came after me with a gun and the people of a small town tried to surround me one day.  I changed my behaviors because of the risk to MYSELF that my lifestyle caused ME.

I decided to become a priest but the priest I went to for advice got a bear hug on me, slobbered on  me and tried to seduce me.  I got away from him and went to the sheriff's office but a deputy refused to do anything about that sex crime because, he said, it was "a church matter."  So I went to the nearest Catholic Church only to be threatened with eternal hellfire if I ever dared to tell anyone.  So I didn't warn a 15 year old friend named Bruce who was so brutalized by that same priest that he turned himself in at the same asylum that had refused to commit my mother.....but they turned him away to so he got a machete and chopped up a child molester.

I gave up on the priesthood and went to college to get a doctorate.  I met a brilliant medical student that I cared about but she had trouble being anywhere close to a male--because a different priest at that parish where I was threatened with hellfire molested her years earlier when she was 12.  The cops and the church had covered that up, too.  Turned out that the woman I loved didn't have so much trouble being close to other females so I walked out on her when she moved in with Kipper--who also found it easier to be near another female after what that cop did to her.

I could go on for hours but, suffice to say, I have spent most of my life trying to expose government corruption and corporate crime so, currently, my FBI records are classified secret by executive order and filed under the heading "foreign counterintelligence."  Homeland Security called the cops in the town where I live now and told them to investigate me so locals have tried to run me out of town.

I am not going to check the "I am having a crisis" box because this is not a crisis.  PTSD is just my normal life and always has been since the first day when mommy tried to kill me.