Stayhopeful, yes, I have been through the issue that family does not want to talk about trauma. It could be too upsetting to them too hear. It may. Be better for you to create a support group. Ask close friends if they would be willing to hear your story and help you heal. You would also need to let them know how you want to be supported.....just listen, give you their ideas on what might help or specifically what you need from them.

Suicide is never the answer. It only hursts loved ones and takes away your opportunity to get better and live your life. While you will always remember your trauma, the idea is to separate your emotions from your trauma by talking about it over and over or writing it over and over (Exposure Therapy) so it doesn’t have the same effect.. Also to be able to cope by using technique when you do get triggered,

I have been through multiple traumas and it hurts. Do you go to therapy? It can help if you have a good therapist that specializes in trauma. You can also talk out your trauma here. The members here on DS are very supportive. I hope you will develop a support team and post here at DS to get the support you need. HUGS.

What I do know is that things can get better than they are now. The beginning part of the journey, the remembering part, can be very hard, but over time with desensitization and coping skills things improve a lot. I think that "complete healing" is possible. It's kind of like with a broken bone where after healing it will be stronger but an x-ray will always show the original break. We can heal and even be stronger than before trauma, we won't forget but details will fade and reactions will wane over time.

Can you see a counselor?, that could help.

Wishing you hugs and peace.

Hugs. I agree the memories coming up can seem to drown out all of anything that was not. I have been here since 2013,. Months after my husband passed from cancer. That trauma dragged everything, every hurt every bit of abuse up to the present. I felt that death would be a welcome event fore me. I found this place that night in the process of doing the plan.
That said , there will always be things that get entangled in your memories, but today is today.

Take a walk, create something, practice grounding techniques when you need them and especially when you don't, so they are second nature. Pick a color and name or write down everything you can find with a good item related to it.

Ex. Green: the grass, the leaves. small little inch worms on the branches, Mint chip ice cream....

Yes, I am one. I didn't start to heal, though, until after 12 years in to my weekly therapy. I refused to talk about being car bombed as a missionary kid abroad. It meant questioning my parents' faith in having following God's calling them to the mission field. My parents, my sister, and I were all together in the car going out for ice cream when the bomb hit us. We survived it and had the car repaired without ever, ever talking about it.

The first time I spoke about it to my therapist after 12 years of silence about it, getting the words out nearly killed me. I thought I was going against my family's mission, going against God Himself, going against our code of silence so my family wouldn't be evacuated from missionary service in a war zone. It was heavy.

But I learned from my PTSD therapist that "repetition brings mastery." You don't end your story by talking about trauma, but you do become the author of your story with the authority to give it a happy ending.

I got better to the point that I went back to grad school and became a traumatologist and a thanatologist--a counselor at a Chicago ER and then a Kansas City ER for folks who just went through trauma and folks with a fatal diagnosis. When kidney disease incapacitated me as to being mobile in a hospital ER, I switched to teaching nursing students bedside manner with dying patients, something I've actually enjoyed doing for 10 years now.

We who have PTSD can't get rid of it, true, but we can turn it around so it's about being what the Buddha called "awakened" when he said his mission was "suffering and the end of suffering." Our trauma was that wake up call, and its message is that we all will face it one day or another and so we need each other.

Like we do in support groups here at DS PTSD. Sending you support today for authoring your story, stay.hopeful31.

I have been healed from many traumas, terrible ones! I am so thankful that mostly I am better. Some days are hard but I do the following quite regularly to help, plus I pray and meditate on New Testament. <3 I'm so sorry you are feeling so bad! Some things that have helped many with anxiety are the following; Taking magnesium (magnesium malate is best) and ginseng helped a lot w both anxiety and depression, they calm the mind body and spirit and get rid of sticky negative thoughts the loop around in the mind. Also, getting outside, laying on the grass to get grounded and breathe in fresh air, looking at stars, these things help a lot too. leisurely walks to work out thoughts. B Complex is great to heal nerves too. Maybe just a quality multi. Work thru the negative memories or thoughts/worries to a better end in your mind, imagining a different outcome to a better result, and it will get it unstuck at the bad part. Our environment help or hurt our mental health and physical health. Speak aloud positive truths to counteract the negative thoughts and things said to us. Also, Volunteering helps us get our of our own misery to help others, which helps us. Call those negatives a lie and correct them to yourself. Protect yourself from those who put that added stress on you and go out and do new challenging things. Learn new things, meet new people, it will get you out of the pit. Hope this helps you, blessings! Many times if we just start with the basic easy things that help us physically, we can deal with the emotional and spiritual better. <3

I really like what Kimmy said here, stay.hopeful31, when she wrote: "Speak aloud positive truths to counteract the negative thoughts and things said to us."

Your post began by describing what happens to many of us with flashbacks: we relive our trauma in our head. Fortunately, a good therapist can help you turn that from a negative into a positive with what Kimmy's saying here.

The brain "rewires" itself in response to trauma, so repetition brings mastery positively, too. That's what we mean by daily strength as the name of this website. By working with your therapist on your PTSD recovery every day, we can support you to rewire your brain p0sitively.

There's not just one way to do this, but many of us found that happened in CBT with a therapist. CBT = "Cognitive Behavioral Therapy." Check it out.

You have so many good replies here, to which i can second many advices. Mostly, I want you to know that my cousin almost died from appendicitis when she was a wee child, and In her sixties now she still has the surgical scar and swears that sometimes it hurts.

Mental scars work the same as physical ones, over time , they lighten and fade, but never completely disappear, and though mostly they go unnoticed in time, there is still the occasional pang of remembering.

And just like with physical scars, no two people heal in the same way or at the same time, it is always a unique and individual path to healing.

And no one, physically or mentalLy, feels like they can tell when it will be healed, it just happens when it happens~

Unique people and problems, same unknowns

Yes, I know people who have healed, and though I am on my own journey, I can say that I have healed some hurts though not all yet.

I hope you stay here, with us on DS, and feel free to Let out all the words you dont feel you can say anywhere else.

Triple hugs~

Thanks for the reply , how long have you been on daily strength,how often do you come online on daily strength ,how long have you been depressed ? What are the medication recommended for you and how have you been coping , do you live alone ? am going through depression since the death of my wife I have been lonely it hasn't been easy for me I guess out of loneliness lead to my depression and it has affected my speech too,,because it like am starting life all over , what are your hobbies , what do you do on your leisure time , to keep you busy , I just need a friend like you I can talk to from time to time

(This message applies to anyone who reads it) Thank you for sharing your feelings. I just started the healing process, and it sucks. However, I do have moments when I feel the tension inside of me subside. I have been repeatedly traumatized and abused throughout my life, and some days it hits me like a brick. I'm all grown up and an attorney now, so you would think I would be able to be logical about this, but it is hard when it is your own mind you are arguing with.

What I can tell you is this: You, I, and everyone in this group have experienced something truly horrible and have lived in "survival mode." It sucks, but if we can survive hell, then imagine how amazing it will be once we can let go of the tension inside of us. When we can breathe air again and not feel our muscles tensing up for no reason whatsoever. I am no expert on this, and today I was triggered just sitting in a car. It was crappy, but I believe I deserve better. I believe you deserve better. I know this sounds cliche but I mean this: You deserve a life of love and to feel amazing. You deserve all of the good things that we are entitled to as human beings. I know I don't know you, but I am glad you and I are on this path together. Do something for yourself today. I am starting to make it a ritual to indulge in something. I've also created a pin board on Pinterest where I pretend 7 yr old me is choosing things for my "future life." Sounds silly, but it is fun to just escape reality and be a kid again with an adult brain.