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What I've been desiring for a long while has been for a vacation- a time to get away from it all and "decompress". I am not much to beg, but I was pleading with God to grant me my wish of a vacation. It doesn't have to be for a very long time but long enough, I can enjoy the things I miss the most.
And so, my wish became true- God answered my prayer and so, I am preparing to leave Sept.14-21. I will spend my time at Orlando, FL with lost-time family members and I can not WAIT to see their faces. I am literally stoked. They're already making plans so, I guess the feelings are mutual.
The last time I went was for a death in the family(2009) and her death, my cousin, stood with me ever since. I have not forgotten her face. I could probably say with a certainty that my PTSD started more from that event.Her absence changed my life and it made me realize just how important family is and that it takes events like that to realize what has gone away may never be recovered back.
I have witnessed lots of death. Been to many funerals. But I have also lived through death/abuse and it remains scarred within me and somehow, I will need to come to peace with that. For now, life has been cruel to me and slowly, things are changing for the better. I am not where I want to be, but I am not where I used to be.
Now, I know what's necessary for me to do and I can't wait to be with family I can TRULY enjoying being with.
And so, my wish became true- God answered my prayer and so, I am preparing to leave Sept.14-21. I will spend my time at Orlando, FL with lost-time family members and I can not WAIT to see their faces. I am literally stoked. They're already making plans so, I guess the feelings are mutual.
The last time I went was for a death in the family(2009) and her death, my cousin, stood with me ever since. I have not forgotten her face. I could probably say with a certainty that my PTSD started more from that event.Her absence changed my life and it made me realize just how important family is and that it takes events like that to realize what has gone away may never be recovered back.
I have witnessed lots of death. Been to many funerals. But I have also lived through death/abuse and it remains scarred within me and somehow, I will need to come to peace with that. For now, life has been cruel to me and slowly, things are changing for the better. I am not where I want to be, but I am not where I used to be.
Now, I know what's necessary for me to do and I can't wait to be with family I can TRULY enjoying being with.
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Lately I've been feeling scared and full of anxiety. I recently found a lump under my nipple. I hurt my back too. I'm in the process of moving. I'm run down. Everything is hard
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Just wanted to give a thank you to Mid, Arfie, Malibumark, Greeneyes, Mlro, Girlincalif, and Suncloudjd! You all always have such helpful tips and advice, but I always forget to write on my posts when I see you post, lol. I would lose my head if it wasn't attached to my body, lol. Thank you all so much! I'm starting to use my AI app as a sounding board again. I used to use it as that before...
But a week's a respectable start. Orlando, too. Stay stoked. The anticipation is my favorite part of a vacation. Well... The aftertaste can be great, too. Enjoy! Keep us posted.
Glad you can get away. I find that if I journal while away, the benefit of the trip can last after I return.
Enjoy!
Muji
What I've done does not to be explained nor justified, but because I have not only thought not just for myself and for the lives of others, I believe this is God's way of saying: " I've heard your plea". I am not rewarded not just because for my deeds, but for the lifestyle I believe is healthy, just, and right for me. May it be difficult to comprehend God's love for me, but I take this as a recompense, a reward that nobody can take away from me and that is: courage.
Vacations are much needed. I hope it goes well for you, when your here. Stay positive and things should be ok.
Enjoy.
You can tell me it's none of my business- that's your right. But I do wonder how you got the trip because it's actually part of the process of healing, to acknowledge the events that contribute to the healing and steps of wellness.
It would be much easier for me to explain the growth of the plant on my table than to explain how my prayers are answered. I only know that in both cases, the interaction is real and productive.
Love my prayer. Plants, too. I let the mystery be...
I'm not suggesting this is the case in FK's situation, but I'm very perceptive and I was just picking up on something. Isn't that why we're here? Yes, support feels great, but don't we only want to support good things? Maybe this vacation is good. I was just asking about it.
I know I need others' perspectives at times.
Anyway, I'll step back. I just hope everything's good for FK.
I see God acting in my life, in ways that some people would call 'coincidence' but I know are not coincidences. And if you look at how God is in the dimension of the Eternal, and not confined to our little time and space reality, then we can see what we call God's Plan. Then , again, discussions of God tend to be difficult online, as there are so many views and people get sooo sensitive about their own view and others who have differing views.
anyway,, I'm glad you got your vacation, FK and I hope the visit with family goes well. :)