Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Support Group
Find support with others who have gone through a traumatic experience. Whether you have chronic or acute PTSD, we are here for you.
Now that I've survived my 4th year in this job, I'm grateful for all the DS PTSD support you've given me to make me able to do that with my PTSD. Before 2011 I had 5 jobs in 4 years. To be stable for 4 years now and be up for tenure next year for permanent job stability is huge for me. Fingers crossed. Thank you all at DS PTSD for the support that got me to this point.
Now I'm thinking of the future in a way I haven't had the track record for before. Obviously, when I was bouncing around from job to job 5 times from 2007-2011, thinking about the future didn't happen much. My life was that of a random pinball ricocheting from here to there without a chance of making a plan. Then, when I got this job in 2011, my thought of the future was to get through my PTSD on the job to the point that I would be around in my 5th year to be tenure eligible then.
So now that I made it thus far I'm thinking, if I get tenure, can I still hope for something for my PTSD in the future again? Yesterday, it occurred to me that I can. Little by little, posting here every day, I got this far, to my 5th year, with my PTSD with DS PTSD's support. If I were to get tenure next year (IF, I know), maybe I could do another 5 years with my PTSD on the same job the same way. If I could do 5 years once, I might be able to do 5 years twice. That would take me to the age of 62. I wouldn't push it, but just hope to go that far with my PTSD, and then retire early.
Retiring early, I could go back and retire in the new democratic Uruguay. Nowadays it's a place so different from the war-torn dictatorship mess where I was tortured and got PTSD in the first place. A lot of the population went through what I did, too. That's sad, but on the other hand mass suffering then means mass recovery now. It means I wouldn't stand out so much as someone in PTSD recovery from torture there. At least, that's the sense I get from visiting back there every year now since 2011.
So thanks for support here at DS PTSD for the past 4 years, because it's given me a positive track record to stand on. I'm hoping I can work with my PTSD for another 5, and then actually have some "golden years" retired, even with my PTSD. I never, ever, ever, ever. ever, ever thought that was possible for me. a future. I checked my pension fund yesterday about it, and it could happen financially, if I can get there emotionally with my PTSD and keep stable in my job with DS PTSD support. Wow.
Even with PTSD, a future....
Now I'm thinking of the future in a way I haven't had the track record for before. Obviously, when I was bouncing around from job to job 5 times from 2007-2011, thinking about the future didn't happen much. My life was that of a random pinball ricocheting from here to there without a chance of making a plan. Then, when I got this job in 2011, my thought of the future was to get through my PTSD on the job to the point that I would be around in my 5th year to be tenure eligible then.
So now that I made it thus far I'm thinking, if I get tenure, can I still hope for something for my PTSD in the future again? Yesterday, it occurred to me that I can. Little by little, posting here every day, I got this far, to my 5th year, with my PTSD with DS PTSD's support. If I were to get tenure next year (IF, I know), maybe I could do another 5 years with my PTSD on the same job the same way. If I could do 5 years once, I might be able to do 5 years twice. That would take me to the age of 62. I wouldn't push it, but just hope to go that far with my PTSD, and then retire early.
Retiring early, I could go back and retire in the new democratic Uruguay. Nowadays it's a place so different from the war-torn dictatorship mess where I was tortured and got PTSD in the first place. A lot of the population went through what I did, too. That's sad, but on the other hand mass suffering then means mass recovery now. It means I wouldn't stand out so much as someone in PTSD recovery from torture there. At least, that's the sense I get from visiting back there every year now since 2011.
So thanks for support here at DS PTSD for the past 4 years, because it's given me a positive track record to stand on. I'm hoping I can work with my PTSD for another 5, and then actually have some "golden years" retired, even with my PTSD. I never, ever, ever, ever. ever, ever thought that was possible for me. a future. I checked my pension fund yesterday about it, and it could happen financially, if I can get there emotionally with my PTSD and keep stable in my job with DS PTSD support. Wow.
Even with PTSD, a future....
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I did the dumbest thing today. I charged my earbuds, unplugged the block and put the block in my little bag instead of the earbuds. I wasn't happy about that when I got to the gym. What a dummy!
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Ever since I stopped doing therapy because of insurance, I've been feeling that old tense and irritable sense of anxiety and stress. I hate that. I was making so many strides and changes during therapy, my therapist would acknowledge all of my progress and accomplishments, and I miss that reassurance. Today I thought about it, and I made those changes! She would always tell me that I chose to...
What you have endured is beyond comprehension. And yet you are a thriving, productive man who has touched so many lives in a loving way. I am sure I speak for everyone here in saying thank you from the very bottom of our hearts. We appreciate you more than you will ever know. And in about 5 and a half years, Uruguay is going to be a much more wonderful, loving country.
May your future bring many smiles to ease many miles.
Congrats Muji!
I'm sooo glad your pension will likely allow you a good retirement x
Yeah now Uruguay has a great president.
My traumatic experiences happened here in Mexico and now when I do not see my sisters or hear from them I really enjoy Mexico.
It would not be a bad place to retire for me either.
I see it with different eyes now that I am recovering a little.
It's wonderful that you share so much... I find that 'using' some of the difficult times as tools to help others gives it a reason for being if that makes sense
Then it doesn't seem as though something awful has happened that I have no control over and can make no sense of... I can share and perhaps lighten someone else's burden and you do this so well muji
You talk in churches and you share here... Imagine those people who hear you and have never dealt with this in any way ... A light might just go off for them and a first step would perhaps be taken
So I believe that people can most definitely go on and thrive with PTSD... Life might be different and challenged ... You have turned a scar into a star as Rev Robert Schuller says... However you have taken on the challenge and you inspire many here....x
But then I go back every year. My USA undergraduate college roommate (class of 1979) went down with me this past year and witnessed it for me. Even though it's a tiny place at the bottom of the world, I have that fish back in water feeling as soon as the airport taxi gets me to town. I get out of the cab and as I put my feet on the pavement, I see the broken tiles of the downtown sidewalks of my hometown. Suddenly, I just feel my place in the world as I stand on those broken sidewalk tiles.
And for those of us orphaned and hurt by PTSD as kids, having a place in the world, just one place where we belong, any place at all, is everything.