Hello, Marisa. Welcome to the forum. I hope you find healing companionship here.

You just did one of the things I do to cope with my PTSD symptoms. Reaching out to share the load is an all important step for this Lone Stranger. The sharing often takes me unexpected places.

Another thing I do is, "Small bytes and long chews." I take ^IT^ in small bytes and chew long and thoroughly before I take my next byte. In this particular step, after I have shared, I sit with it and see where it takes me. When the time is right for the next byte, where to target is obvious to me.

But that is me. . .

Welcome to the forum, Marisa. The healing journey is unique for each of us. Gentle support while you find your own way through your own chaos.

Welcome:-) That is similar to one of the traumas in my past. IN my case, not a friend so mcuh as friendly-acquaintance-classmate. End result was similar to what you describe. I can only recommend you come here, and hopefully you can find healing, and maybe a therapist in real life to help with learning how to cope with symptoms... And take hope, from knowing I was raped at 17, and yet, here I am, married almost 25 years, and in retrospect, that's sorta miraculous, b/c the first year after it happened, I walked around ready to knife anyone who touched me. Yikes.
Gentle hugs of welcome to you, and you are safe here,
Leo

welcome here there a ton of us have exsprearance what you have , hope you find comfort here hugs min

Welcome. I'm so sorry you were raped, and by someone you knew. I was, too, twice when I was a kid. An adult who was supposed to protect us raped me and 3 other elementary school boys and girls. Fortunately, though it took time, he was tried and convicted and got 25 years for his crimes. Justice was done.

But his punishment didn't take back the fact that I was raped. I went into counseling, got on meds for depression, and learned all I could learn about panic attacks and PTSD. It was key that I had a therapist to talk to.

As support for my counseling, I joined a face to face support group like this one that I attended weekly. When I moved to another state, I replaced that one with with one online, and I'm here daily.

Things are much better now, but they're not the same. My family abandoned me in shame, unable to accept that I, a male, had been raped. I gave up on dating because it just stirred up more for me than it had to offer me, and that's sad. But I function well at my job and at church, and I've got a lot of friends here at DS PTSD. I had some flashbacks last week, but none at all this week, so I'm glad of that.

I'm off almost all meds now except for a new one that helps with nightmares and sleep, Prazosin. I recommend getting your doc to prescribe that one.

So I'm really glad you found us. This is a healing place.

welcome to a really good group. i'm so sorry for what happened to you, you are going to find a lot of understanding here and comfort. gentle hugs, Lilly

I'm sorry you are going through something so terrible. I hope you find your peace and comfort here. I promise you you are not alone. We're here if you need somebody. You can always message me if you need to talk. Keep posting. I guarantee you it helps to have a group of people like this on your side.

Hi Marisa - I just wanted to share our story. I have a foster daughter that ran away from us when she first came to live with us. She was assaulted while by someone she knew and thought they were her friend. She was hearing his voice and having lots of nightmares. We saw her psychologist and after taking Quetiapine at night and Fluoxetin in the morning she is in a lot better shape. Just to say we can't let those creeps that take advantage win. Things will get better.