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Crazy Family

MarkS
MarkS

Hi again everyone,


I had some crazy stuff happening today. I am feeling okay with it in the end result, but it certainly left me feeling a bit funny.


The story...


Earlier today my oldest sister who I am working with quite a but, received a note from a family friend (sort of). The friend is a retired Psychologist and she had talked with my mother and youngest sister (Hilary) with regard to my middle sister. It seems that my middle sister (Darcy) who is a recovered alcholic had relapsed. Hilary and her husband had helped Darcy before with Detox etc. So the husband flew (19 hrs with stop overs) from the Carribean to BC, Canada to help Darcy get into Detox and whatever else she needed. Darcy long term boyfriend I gather (never met him myself) is quite a sh*t and probably narcaccist to boot, and on the first day Hilary's hubby was there physically threatened him. After he did that, Hilary's hubby asked to taken to a local motel and flew back home the next day. (just as an aside he is about 90% blind). He did manage to get Darcy signed in to a detox before he left.


Anyway the other weird part of the is that no one even told us about any of this, and it was only through the family friend that we found out about it. I talked to Hilary who is close to Darcy (and who's Hubby briefly went out to help) about it and she said everything was handled and not to worry about it.


I guess I was feeling very odd about this. I am not super close with the rest of my family, but it would be nice to be told, and I guess it really doesn't feel good, not even receiving a  quick note on Facebook or email saying that Darcy was going into Detox.



Mark

patti22
patti22
Perhaps rather than looking for a FB post, you could call her once a month or so and check in? Talk? Let her know you care, hear your voice and all of that?
Community LeaderSunCloudJD
SunCloudJD
People who suffer from addiction often are hard on themselves.... It's an illness with a massive stigma and a lot of shame

She may not have wanted to share that she's relapsed...… I would do as Patti suggested and maybe give her a call soon …..

Big hug.....xo
Community Leadermujicaptsd
mujicaptsd
Reading what happened, the same thing SunCloud said here occurred to me, too. Going to rehab the first time is celebrated by lots of people. But going after a relapse can be different in ways that may make folks not want to be as public. Reaching out like Patti said might be the way to go, then.
MarkS
MarkS
Thanks everyone for the advice. My sister is in detox right now (and related processes) so it will be at least a week before I can talk with her.

It is hard though as my mother did as part of her narcissist behavior a divide and conquer thing with myself and my sisters. As a result none of us are especially close (although myself and my oldest sister became quite close after the fact). The last time we were all in the same space (for a day) was in 1997. My sister, the one with the alcohol problem I haven't seen in something like 13 years.

Anyway thanks again. It is really nice to get someone else's view (especially someone who has been through crazy stuff themselves).
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