I do not go on FB, because o me it is a Fatal Byotchfest. All it does, as far as I can tell, is help people find out things they did not want to know, or magnify human natures worst traits... Slippery Cyberslope. I say, to heck with FB for a bit, take a break from it.
My p doc asked me first thing, three years ago when we met, what social media I use. I said DS only, no FB or twitter etc., and he said Good... because first thing he does for anxxiety disorder patients is tell them to get off social media. DS exempted because he looked at the site and approved.

Let it flow away from you, DSF. Cheering you on:-)

I do like the positive aspects of fb; I'm trying really hard to get past this. I'm starting therapy tomorrow. I guess I'm concerned about the dance instructor spreading gossip about me. I'm sorry if I made him uncomfortable by making too much eye contact and hyperventilating, and I respect that he had the right to refuse to dance with me, but he seems to be a drama queen who seemed to use being a "rape victim" to get attention from girls. I just find it disgusting that he was allowed to assault me. I shouldn't have ever looked him up on Facebook because I found out he is a black belt and went on a trip to the beach after assaulting me last year. They didn't know I was an incest victim or that I am oversexed and have done anal or that I was on a lot of painkillers. I think they wanted me to fall down on the ground in pain. I will leave them alone, but I find their actions morally reprehensible. Yes, I the pervert, find them disgusting.

I guess I shouldn't call him a drama queen; I suppose he felt trauma from dancing with me, even though I never touched him inappropriately.

It's all like a nightmare.

My assault was traumatizing on multiple levels:
It was at the front door, in public. He said, "it's okay" right after I screamed. I'm being called a rapist, being assaulted, and being told that he's so repulsed by me that I might as well be a guy; that he could kick me up to my clitoris. And, as I'm walking away, the owner runs after HIM to comfort the poor little guy. And it still hurts when I have a bowel movement, even though I was kicked in August.

I hope your therapy helps you with this. It was humiliating for you but maybe you can achieve a bit more peace of mind. Good luck

Thank you looney1!

I got a scare just looking at my FB page a few months ago. I don't go there much any more, and when I took a peek I remembered why. Sorry this happened to you, and like Loo I really hope therapy can help so you're not scared. I know how you feel.

Go easy on yourself, OK? Knowing "more" about the Harm-Causers in our lives isn't always good. We get brain-spinny, as I call it. The more I learned about my epilepsy,t he safer I felt, but the more I find out about the sickness in my dad's family? The more I wish I was blissfully ignorant.

They caused *you* harm. We can't read each other's minds or pasts or triggers. Big purrs.

He didn't feel trauma dancing with you...get that straight. He couldn't handle his own demons of wanting someone that he didn't/couldn't control. Believe every athlete knows where to damage another , I do look at dancing as a graceful form of athletics. But his mind was bent, not yours unless you could see yourself inflicting pain on someone like that out of any insecure emotional attachment to get even. He has that.
Quit giving him the excuse for it, hat's a bad habit that is hard to break.

It's not doing you a lot of good to subvertly follow on FB or other social media and inquire about his whereabouts either. Your friends that really support you wouldn't offer this information, friends tend to want to protect who they care about. Time to trim that address book to those that really care about you. That means if a" friend" has made a point about helping you feel sorry for him in this case...they are the part of the crowd that instigates drama and not a friend to you at all but more of a puppet master.

I am sorry to be so frank but I have been in a place where I thought, convinced myself I had a part in what was done to me, when it wasn't ever in my control.

Support. Jewell

My personal paranoia runs on cycles far more than events. The imminent threat is not paranoia. I reserve the right to get highly agitated over spinal injuries. You kicked me WHERE? On what level should I approve of that? I reserve the right to preventative measures for repeat performances.

From there, my personal pattern is to start cycling through the PTSD symptoms. I do believe I have more than one cycle in that nightmare-go-round. Hyper-vigilance to paranoia to blind rage is at least one of my more identified cycles. Typecasting an entire collegiate alumni would be well into my paranoia phase. Them Texas Longhorns is all ________. Can't trust none of 'em?

But that is me. . .

Are YOU being paranoid? That is yours to sort, ds. You have all the insider data. Gentle support while you sort.

Jewells1.. Thank you for the reply. I haven't inquired about his whereabouts and I need to stop wondering if he attended the wedding. But I really hope he doesn't join the Irish group I'm in or start attending church with me either. I feel better now. Thanks for helping my thinking!

ds I have already shared a lot today but...
What I said about every athlete knows how to injure another? He was most probably aiming to break your tailbone, since that would have taken your ability away of your gift of dancing. Hard enough and he could break the pubic symphysis, forever affecting your ability to dance, or walk. I have had my tailbone broke and still am in discomfort from it. That's a masochistic power trip.
I have also had all the bones in the palms of my hands broke to stop me from drawing. But even with pain I still get around and still draw...because the gift of the vision of doing things like that is in the mind of the artist. You will heal physically, though you may still be aware of the twinges of reminders. But if you let him break your belief in your art of dancing and being the music with interfering thoughts that you may have deserved this in some way... That will do more damage than a damaged pelvic structure.

If your dance community is too small to guarantee that your path doesn't cross....look into starting your own non profit group. There is money in federal Arts grants for start up if you include children in training and programs... then leave him and all he tried to mess with about you, in the dust.

Therapist are great resources for helping you find these resources or showing you where they are already in existence.

J.