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Allowing Change

arfie
arfie

Resistance to change is a recurring theme in Nature. However desperate the current circumstances, many, many life forms will defend their misery rather than gamble on the unknown. An injured bird on the verge of death will find heroic energy reserves to attack and/or flee rescuers who sincerely want to save his/her life.


I believe I am holding steady through my current round of Intrusive Thoughts. I only believe. I KNOW it is hard for me to distinguish fact from denial while my thoughts are jumping track at the speed of a hyper-vigilant startle. This morning's wandering wonder is whether the current round of intrusive thoughts is caused by resistance to change. The visualization which seems to best define ^it^ is an image of a hoarder defending all the piles and stacks which have accumulated over the years, saying, "No. Can't let that habit go. Ya never know when you might need it. Nope. Can't let that stigma go. Ya never know when an eccentric collector will be ready to pay top dollar for it."


Reality checks needed. Am I making sense?

Spiral
Spiral
Perfectly! Change is hard for us because there is a comfort in misery. It is familiar and frankly sometimes it just takes to much effort to and energy to change.
arfie
arfie
I put ALLOT of time and effort into creating the changes currently underway in my life.

Now that the changes are committed and in motion, I find myself disoriented, frightened and confused.
jennyoo7
jennyoo7
Just a simple thought here but isn't change a HUGE trigger for many mentally ill people? I remember moving cities and I lost my shit, suicidal, racing thoughts, depression, hypervigilance, you name it. I think the thing to focus on is how do i gradually accept this change not focussing on the change being the issue itself. I can't say what worked for me or even give you suggestions on what may work for you but I believe I was in similar throws that you are going through now and eventually, obviously, it all panned out.

So there is the root of your problem, change. Now it's a matter of waiting for your emotions and intelligence to align, through intrusive thoughts and hyper vigilance you are getting there but I think the focus would be helping your self be mindful throughout so as to avoid those two very uncomfortable feelings. Simply said I said of course. Change is inevitable, struggling to get there can be a choice if you work on it.
arfie
arfie
Well said, Jenny. I think. . . Sure is a slippery dichotomy to get a handle on.

The change does seem to happen more smoothly if I donae worry it too closely and just let healing mysteries their own course, at their own speed.
Community LeaderSunCloudJD
SunCloudJD
Change can be really hard for sure.... Hoarding is a serious disorder that needs treatment if it's bad....

"Things" almost take on a life of their own and people can get 'clutter blindness'

Big hug for you sweetie.... Intrusive thoughts suck..... xo
Muskoka007
Muskoka007
I hear you Arfie, confusion and disorientation...feeling that too. Probably part of the journey of change, it feels foreign and scary. I think that is normal. Intrusive thoughts are rude and annoying, wish the "thoughts" would take a break. Hang in there hugs
lilmissy7
lilmissy7
I like how you said about the healing mysteries.
Gentle hugs Arfie <3
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