I flip out when people think I give good advice. Mostly b/c if I give good advice, why am I a train wreck? I do talk to *myself*.... Apparently, not well? I find it all very unsettling. I usually end up taking a lot of deep calming breaths per therapy exercises, and instead of advising, asking. My two BFFs and I do that with each other, and that's why after 30 years, we're still the Trio, I guess. We lead ourselves to water and see if we think?

I've no idea what I'm babbling.

Thanks for your honesty. I am guessing that most if not all of us are never quite sure if we've offered too much advice or not offered any direction at all. On this message board, but also in our daily lives. One thing my therapist has told me (I guess here comes the advice) is that the way I was raised I never had any normal, loving role models to learn how to interact with people. So I often say or do too much or else not enough. It's interesting you mention you inner TV talk show host. I spent much of my life thinking I was the star of my own TV series, and really only started to be spontaneous in my 30s; sometimes too spontaneous for my own good. This is related to what I feel is the fine line (within me anyway) between feeling superior and feeling inferior. Praying for you to have a great weekend.

the moment someone says "I learned something from you" i cut them off right there. of course you did. i have lots of interesting things to say and wisdom to share. move on. i don't want that pedestal. to easy to fall off. yet they keep asking me for advice- more to the point my opinion on everything in their world. then they go and get mad at me when i'm honest with them. they act like i am trying force my way/opinions on them. whoops there goes that pedestal.
i summed it up once in a little poem.....

My Life.
My Experiences.
My Opinions.
Get Your Own.

Agreed...I seek balance too.

I always ask advice from those who are humble enough to think they're not in a position to give any. I recall asking you via private message on DS for advice about where to look to in my retirement in 3 years. Last night I spent a few hours doing online about that city we talked about. So thanks for your advice, arfie, thanks for how humbly you give it, and thanks for only giving it when asked. You're a great adviser.

If you have experience then you can share that to others. Don't give advice about topics you don't know jack shit about