Physical & Emotional Abuse Support Group
Abuse is a general term for the treatment of someone that causes some kind of harm (to the abused person, to the abusers themselves, or to someone else) that is unlawful or wrongful. No one deserves abuse, period. Abuse can be emotional, physical, or sexual.
Hi. Today, according to my H, I am immature and need to grow up. I am wholly responsible for our marriage being as bad as it is. I am hard to live with and solely to blame for the lack of intimacy in our marriage. I am to blame for him blowing up and yelling at me because I frustrated him.
Add this to the list that already exists:
I am emotionally unavailable, selfish, mentally ill, a moron, uncaring, unloving, uninvolved, the bitch who ruined his life, a bad wife, a bad housekeeper......just to name a few. I don't feel good about myself.
Then my son gives me a hug and tells me I am the best mum in the world and I have something to live for.
Who do you believe in this life? Am I really all of these things? How do you shake off the labels long enough to be objective about yourself?
Can I really be that bad or am I just not what he wants me to be? How long do you stay and listen and try to change yourself? When do you give up trying and realize that you just can't be who he wants you to be and the anxiety is slowly killing you. When do you just say it doesn't matter who is to blame, it just isn't working and I so badly need to be free from the stress? So hard to let go when I feel responsible and feel I need to fix it.
Feeling anxious, bad, confused, depressed, eroded, fragile, gutted, helpless, idiotic, jittery, knifed in the heart, lost, messed up, nothing of worth, over it, patronized, questioned, rejected, sad, traumatized, unloved, valueless,worthless, x-hausted, yelled at, zoned out.
Hey, got a feeling for every letter.
Sorry about the rave, been a LONG day
Add this to the list that already exists:
I am emotionally unavailable, selfish, mentally ill, a moron, uncaring, unloving, uninvolved, the bitch who ruined his life, a bad wife, a bad housekeeper......just to name a few. I don't feel good about myself.
Then my son gives me a hug and tells me I am the best mum in the world and I have something to live for.
Who do you believe in this life? Am I really all of these things? How do you shake off the labels long enough to be objective about yourself?
Can I really be that bad or am I just not what he wants me to be? How long do you stay and listen and try to change yourself? When do you give up trying and realize that you just can't be who he wants you to be and the anxiety is slowly killing you. When do you just say it doesn't matter who is to blame, it just isn't working and I so badly need to be free from the stress? So hard to let go when I feel responsible and feel I need to fix it.
Feeling anxious, bad, confused, depressed, eroded, fragile, gutted, helpless, idiotic, jittery, knifed in the heart, lost, messed up, nothing of worth, over it, patronized, questioned, rejected, sad, traumatized, unloved, valueless,worthless, x-hausted, yelled at, zoned out.
Hey, got a feeling for every letter.
Sorry about the rave, been a LONG day
You ask:
""""""""""""""""""Who do you believe in this life?"""""""""""""""""""""""""
When I was an undergrad,
before I got into psychology,
I took a course in Logic. Let's
look at your question from
that angle. . . . logically:
"Who do you believe in this life?"
Well, for starters,
since you're here on
a forum for abuse
victims and survivors,
you must have a pretty
clear idea by now, that
he's an abuser.
And since we know that
abusers LIE. . . . . . .
then. . . . . maybe we could
agree that
the last person to believe
would be an abuser.
I have a hunch that you
don't actually believe him.
I hope not.
To address another question
(even though it might have
been rhetorical), is. . . . .
It's time to go when you've
had enough toxicity and you
want the better, healthier life
that's out there waiting for you.
I urge you to take the steps
that are needed to get yourself
to that happier, healthier life.
Every day you don't is a day
you'lll never get to do over.
They don't flow backwards,
only away from you.
I hope you won't throw
any more away.
Take good care.
Leave, and go NO CONTACT. The voice slowly becomes muted, and the one that lives inside you, in your gut, overpowers it. You get yourself back, you get your joy back, and you are free....
PS, your son gets it. He really does. Do it for him.
((Hugs))